UnNews:Mother Sells Daughter's Virginity on Television
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Mother Sells Daughter's Virginity on Television
We distort, you deride
Friday, March 23, 2018, 13:45:UTC)(
13 August 2009
Mother of seven Sally Caulton-Njie has today defended her decision to allow her daughter's virginity to be sold on an X Factor style reality television programme.
Sally, 30, recently agreed a deal with television executives to allow the show to be aired on low-brow British cable channel Nuts TV, and has insisted that she is happy for the show to go ahead in spite of fierce resistance from the British public. Daughter Brandice, 16, will join fellow judges Jodi Marsh and former Big Brother contestant Makosi to watch over 300 men audition for a chance to take her virginity. The men will be required to sing, dance, write crude limericks and appear completely naked in front of the panel, before the final 8 each take Brandice on a series of lavish dates. She will choose the winner with her mother on September the 14th. 'Who Wants to Have Sex With my Daughter' will air in late August.
Sally lives with soon-to-be-fourth-husband David, a Nigerian immigrant who is currently learning English as they prepare for their wedding. He is father to her two youngest children, with the other five all born to different fathers. She admits that she isn't sure who Brandice's father is, but is quick to defend her cosmopolitan family, laughing as she admits their Luton council house is 'never dull'.
When quizzed on the morality behind her decision to allow her daughter's virginity to be auctioned off on television however; she is less amused. "I can't understand why people have such a problem with it," Sally says, incredulous. "I mean otherwise she'll just lose it to one of the (boys) on the estate and get knocked up. This is her chance to get off this estate and make something of herself."
Brandice herself also seems keen on the idea, stating proudly that she is the only girl at her school to remain a virgin. "Me and my Mum had this idea a couple of years ago," she says as mother and daughter simultaneously light cigarettes. "Since then I've just been waiting to get legal. It's my chance to get famous and maybe find a rich guy." When asked what kind of man she'd like to meet she is unequivocal in her response: "A footballer."
Sally also has no concerns over the type of man that would audition to take a 16 year-olds virginity. "At the end of the day it's no different to selling insurance, or shoes. I'm sure we might get the odd perve but they'll be booted by week 2."
"People might judge me for what I'm doing but I don't care. When I was 16 I had two kids and a crack addiction to deal with. I don't want her to suffer from the same troubles I had."
Who Wants to Take My Daughter's Virginity can be seen on Nuts TV at 8pm 21st August.