UnNews:Moro Islamic Liberation Front needs new acronym
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Moro Islamic Liberation Front needs new acronym
Straight talk, from straight faces
Friday, August 28, 2015, 14:48:UTC)(
14 August 2006
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MINDANAO, Philippines, GNN (GOANNA NEWS NETWORK) -- Mortified leaders of the Moro Islamic Liberation Front, a militant separatist group seeking to establish an Islamic state in the southern Philippines, today admitted that they needed to think about getting a new acronym for their jihadist army.
MILF spiritual leader Sheikh Salamat Pagi said that while surfing the net for American pornography - solely as research for a sermon on the evils of the Great Satan, mind you - he became aware that his organisation's acronym also stands for "mothers I'd like to fuck".
"It is truly disgusting, but it just shows how decadent America - death be upon it - really is," he said.
"These so-called MILF women of America have damned themselves to everlasting torment by exposing their long, blonde, hair, their large, pendulous breasts and their shaven, dripping shame-holes to the world."
When asked for her reaction, Tiffany White, a spokeswoman for the California chapter of Mothers I'd Like to Fornicate With (which is not associatied with the Philippines MILFs), issued only this short statement: "Look, I can't really talk now because I have to get Timmy to soccer practice. TIMMY! GET IN THE CAR!"
Philippines Army spokesman Lieutenent-Colonel Rafael Gomez, however, said he believed that his country's MILF should stick with the name it has.