UnNews:Moby Dick fossil found in Peruvian desert
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-microsecond misinformation.
4 July 2010
LIMA, Peru -- Researchers making fools of them selves wasted no time in scanning the Peruvian desert for whale fossils and other fish bones. The media spared no mercy making fun of them, but the head researcher, Professor Jelle Reumer, had the last laugh when he stumbled upon the remains of a "sea monster" thirty times the size of a modern day killer whale, that is so large, it could only be the remains of Moby Dick.
The teeth of "Moby Dick" were so large it was initially assumed they were sun-bleached rib bones.
"There were no white whales in South America’s deserts before 3 million years ago, and the specimens found have an age of 12 to 15 million years, so that was totally impossible," said Professor Reumer, leader of the team of scientists who found the fossil in the Pisco-Ica desert in coastal Peru.
They had been searching for other types of whale fossils in a remote area some 300 kilometers south of Lima. "The place where we found it was 20 kilometers from the nearest village, and far from the nearest water," said Reumer, who is also director of Natural History Museum in Rotterdam. “We now know for certain that fish and other sea monsters used to live in the deserts. But finding the remains of Moby Dick was beyond our wildest expectations!”
The fossilized remains found in Peru include a jawbone and a number of teeth, ribs and pelvis, each around 12 meters in diameter and up to 3 meters in length.
The size of its teeth indicate that the mammal fed on large prey, possibly baleen whales which were plentiful at the time of Dick’s existence around 12 million to 13 million years ago, in the middle of the Melvillien Age, Reumer said.
"After the time of Melville it became relatively much colder. At the same time the baleen whales became bigger probably to escape being caught up in the epic battle between Capt Ahab and Moby Dick, which was awesome! Another possible reason why the whales got bigger was to avoid being eaten by Moby Dick, just the way elephants escaped predation by becoming bigger so they were not scared by mice any more," he said. Baleen whales now grow to 30 meters in length. Back then; they were much smaller, around six to ten meters long. This was possibly due to their living so far from the sea.
Reumer says Moby Dick could be best compared to a humungous modern killer whale. Killer whales feast on sea lions, seals, fish, birds and sometimes other whales.
The discovery was named after Herman Melville, the author of the novel Moby Dick.
Reumer says there is very little chance another will be found. "There’s only one Moby Dick in all history!” he said.
- Daily Mail Reporter "Monster of the Deep: Scientists find fossil skull of 43ft long whale which had 14in teeth". Daily Mail Online, July 4, 2010