UnNews:Microsoft secures "Xbone.com" domain name

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13 September 2013

Jolly-roger

The logo for the new Microsoft gaming-apps website will appeal to gamers by using as its logo the skull and — X Bones.

REDMOND, Washington -- Microsoft has bought the domain name Xbone.com for its new gaming console, which sources say will be named the X Bone.

The website will be made available to gamers who purchase the X Bone, and may let them purchase apps for it, something Microsoft decided would not be necessary in the case of its previous toy, known as the Surface RT.

The move is seen as a reversal of strategy at the gigantic corporation. Previously, Microsoft had decided that the best way to sell more of its software was to buy the companies that make the poorly selling boxes it runs on, such as all of Dell and half of Nokia OY. The latest misstep was the decision of Steve Ballmer to dally for twelve more slow months before finally riding off into the sunset and becoming a "philanthropic" nuisance like fellow Microsoft founder Bill Gates.

Xbox

The bone-shaped game console can be used both as a drain stopper (shown here) and as a doorstop.

Reaction in the marketplace was immediate, as a half dozen male porn stars filed protests with ICANN claiming that "X bone" was the trade name of each of them. Larry Flynt took action the same day, registering a business in Chatsworth, California, under the trade name XXXbone.

Microsoft developers, however, were underwhelmed. Major Nelson said, “It disrespects the teams that have developed the X Bone.” But the prospect of disrespecting its developers seems to have closed the deal; Microsoft is said to have dismissed three separate focus groups and bought the domain anyway, within two days.

Microsoft used a broker to make the costly purchase for the bone-shaped console, reportedly the same one a Boston oral surgeon used to procure the domain name anusmile to advertise his own business.

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