UnNews:McCartney offers Heather Mills "a nice shoe"

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Revision as of 03:30, December 22, 2011 by MadMax (talk | contribs)

(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to: navigation, search
This article is part of UnNews UnNews Logo Potato1 UnFair and UnBalanced

17 October 2007

17102007b
Mills, drops her guard briefly to reveal her DEMONIC SOUL, yesterday.

IT HAS BEEN REVEALED THAT former Rolling Stones frontman Paul McCartney has offered his estranged wife (the evil) Heather Mills a divorce settlement of a new shoe, Unnews reported next week.

Quoting a series of authentically fabricated sources, Unnews said that Sir Paul initially offered Mills a "nice, sensible walking shoe", but Mills's legal team had negotiated that up to "a durable, waterproofed hiking boot". One source suggested that "with the inclusion of a thermal sock we may be tantalisingly close to a deal".

"Whilst the acrimonious negotiations have been dragging for months and months and months and months and months Heather has finally managed to get them to hike the package up to a nice hiking boot," the fictitious source told Unnews.

Media reports have suggested that (the evil) Heather Mills, 39, was seeking up to three shoes, each to be supplied with a lifetime supply of appropriate polishes and cleaning products. Sir Pauls team rejected these claims "as outrageous" and threatened to have the money grabbing trollop killed.

Heather hilariously lost a leg a while ago.

edit Sources

Personal tools
projects