UnNews:McCain to announce VP via tin can and string
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McCain to announce VP via tin can and string
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Wednesday, June 29, 2016, 08:07:UTC)(
14 August 2008
PHOENIX, AZ - In response to Barack Obama's announcement earlier this week that he will reveal his running mate via text messaging and e-mail, Republican Presidential candidate John McCain announced Wednesday that he too would reveal his choice in a method that respected his base - via tin can and string.
"The age of modern technology is upon us" he announced at a press conference Wednesday, before shouting jibberish and defecating on one of his supporters. "Obama made his decision to to let his base know first, to show he is in with the times. Senator McCain isn't any different." McCain advisor Mick Avenge told our reporter.
While this announcement remains highly anticipated, sources say that it may be some time before his choice is revealed.
|This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.|