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**19 October 2009**

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**BOSTON, Massachusetts** -- Two post-doctoral researchers at renowned Massachusetts Institute of Technology made the news today, claiming a breakthrough on a famous problem. This particular work will earn them cash for solving a *"Millenium Problem"*.

The **Millennium Prize Problems** are seven problems in mathematics that were stated by the **Clay Mathematics Institute** in 2000. The correct solution to any of the problems results in a US$1,000,000 prize (sometimes called a Millennium Prize) being awarded by the institute. Only the **Poincaré conjecture** has been solved, by **Grigori Perelman**.

**Mohammed Piltdown** and **Sheri Masticate** presented their findings at an impromptu table tennis match (*pictured*) between Nobel Laureates in physics and medicine repectively, **Howard Cosell** and **Ambrose Cantelever** on October 13, then posed for photos and retired to a black tie gala at the **Copley Hotel.**

The cause of all the hubbub is the so-called *"P = NP problem"*, has vexed seismoligists for decades. **Sir Oxnard Montalvo** of the **Ruhi Institute** explains the gist of the problem: *"The relation between the complexity classes P and NP is studied in computational complexity theory, the part of the theory of computation dealing with the resources required during computation to solve a given problem. The most common resources are time (how many steps it takes to solve a problem) and space (how much memory it takes to solve a problem)."*

**Sir Oxnard** was unable to explain what this all has to do with seismology due to a trouser malfunction, and no one else at the party would talk with us. More on this story as it devolves.

## edit Sources

- Salvatore Gorgonzolla "Hawt post-gradz will poze for u".
*Vatican Times and Spaces*, October 15, 2009