UnNews:Lord Monckton denies denying denial
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Lord Monckton denies denying denial
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Tuesday, September 27, 2016, 00:21:UTC)(
6 March 2010
ROSWELL, New Mexico -- UnNews was just informed of a striking new development in the career of acclaimed denier, Lord Christopher Monckton. Apparently, in a recent Uncyclopedia article (Lord Christopher Monckton) it was reported that Lord Monckton denies that he ever denied that he would deny the sexual favors of a young British lady in a blue dress. In fact he flatly denies denying the incident ever took place.
According to Uncyclopedia, Lord Monckton, 1st Nobel of Benchelly, is the 2nd Uncle of Prince Phillip, and will most probably become King of England unless HM The Queen lives forever, which is the case thus far. He is an inventor, a juggler of balls and was the former advisor to Dennis Thatcher during the time when Margaret was being a real bitch.
He is perhaps best known for being a world-renowned “Denier”, who has successfully denied that the Earth was round - for which he was awarded a Nobel Prize after having proved the Earth was globe shaped, and also that he is the father of Prince William.
UnNews spoke with Lord Monckton just before he began his denials to the teachers and students of Mayfair-Alien Kindergarten, in Roswell, New Mexico, and we asked him if it was true that he had denied denying the sexual favors of a UK girl dressed in blue?
In response Lord Monckton laughed and said, “Oh that! Well, of course I deny denying that I would deny her my undivided attention, if, and when, we might have a spin in private. In fact, to be perfectly frank I deny that I have EVER even visited England in my entire life, what to speak of denying that I would deny the sexual advances of a young lady, which I most certainly deny that I would deny denying!”
|This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.|