UnNews:Lindsey Lohan attends sex addiction support group, attendance quadruples
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Lindsey Lohan attends sex addiction support group, attendance quadruples
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Tuesday, July 25, 2017, 02:56:UTC)(
12 December 2006
|UnNews Audio (file info)|
|Listen to this story!|
Problems playing this file? You might be a dope.
NEW YORK, New York -- Lindsay Lohan says she's been going to Sex Addicts Anonymous meetings for a year, but hasn't talked about it because "it's just too damned hot." A source says attendance at the meetings has quadrupled since Lohan began attending.
"I just left a sex adddicts meeting, where I spent over an hour describing my latest encounters and fantasies in minute detail," the 20-year-old actress tells People magazine in a story posted Tuesday on its Web site.
"I haven't had sex in seven days. Including 'licking my own stamp'," she says. "I'm not in a serious relationship, so why would I? I don't have sex when I go to clubs. I sometimes have sex with older movie stars at home, but there's no need to. I feel better not having sex constantly. It's more fun."
"I've been going to the meetings for a year by the way," Lohan adds. When asked why didn't she say so until recently, she replies: "Well it's no one's business. That's why it's anonymous!"
Her publicist, Leslie Sloane Zelnik, didn't immediately respond Tuesday to a message from The Associated Press seeking comment and more sexy photos to wank to.