UnNews:Keys quits after new video shows him holding door open for woman
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|This article is part of UnNews||Your source for up-to-the-microsecond misinformation.|
26 January 2011
LONDON, England -- Sky Sports presenter Richard Keys has quit this evening, after a new video was released showing him holding a door open for female colleague Charlotte Jackson, a woman who has her own arms. The 53 year old has been under increasing pressure to resign after comments he and pundit Andy Gray made about female linesman Sian Massey at the weekend. This latest leak is said to have made Keys' position untenable.
Moral guardian Karen Brady was quick to condemn the latest video: "This dinosaur obviously still believes women do not contain the strength or initiative to open doors for themselves," she claimed, "Such actions may have been acceptable twenty years ago, but attitudes have changed and doors have decreased in weight."
Keys' resignation comes just a day after his colleague Gray was sacked following the release of a video showing the former Everton striker watching an episode of BBC series Top Gear.
The initial media storm was created at the weekend when an off-air recording of the two discussing female assistant referee Sian Massey's decision to grow out her hair was leaked to the Sunday Mail. Transcript follows:
- Richard Keys: Well, somebody better get down there and explain that the 2010 trend for shorter hair is carrying on into 2011.
- Andy Gray: Yeah, I know. Can you believe that? Forget what I said – does she not realise it's all about the sleeky bob?
- RK: Course she doesn't
- AG: Pulled-back with braid? Somebody’s fucked up big.
- Nick Parker and Neil Syson "He's Fat! He's Round! He's watched it in his Lounge! Andy Gray". Sun Newspaper, January 25, 2011