UnNews:Kate Moss dropped from lucrative advertising contracts, again
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Kate Moss dropped from lucrative advertising contracts, again
Every time you think, you weaken the nation —Moe Howard
Tuesday, October 25, 2016, 01:44:UTC)(
6 February 2007
LONDON, England --- Kate Moss was yesterday dropped from a string of lucrative advertising contracts after shock revelations that her one-time boyfriend, Pete Doherty, was caught driving with neither a licence nor insurance. He was also without Ministry of Transport (MOT) papers, suggesting that there is a possibility, however remote, that his car was not roadworthy.
The revelations stunned the fashion world. Ms Moss at first vehemently denied that she had been in the car with Mr Doherty whilst he was driving illegally, but later admitted that she had seen him on the same day but hadn't done anything to stop him.
A spokesman for Chanel, the fashion house, said that these allegations are “far more serious” than the last time Ms Moss and Mr Doherty had problems with the law. In September 2005, London's Daily Mirror ran front page and inside photos that seemed to show Moss snorting several lines of cocaine at a Babyshambles recording session.
On 16 June 2006, British police finally dropped the cocaine charges for lack of evidence. Ultimately Moss was cleared of all charges, and resumed her modelling career.
“Whilst the use of cocaine is acceptable in fashion circles (I myself have some with my breakfast), driving without a licence is a serious crime. I cannot think of something worse, except perhaps travelling on the Tube without paying your fare. Murder and cocaine is one thing, but a lack of a licence!” the Chanel spokesman said, before throwing his hands up in despair.
Initially Ms Moss distanced herself from Mr Doherty’s absolutely reprehensible actions.
She has since issued a statement, saying “I take full responsibility for my actions. I also accept that there are various personal issues that I need to address and have started taking the difficult, yet necessary, steps to resolve them. I want to apologise to all of the people I have let down because of my behaviour which has reflected badly on my family, friends, co-workers, business associates and others”.