UnNews:Junior Dave fails his history lesson
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Junior Dave fails his history lesson
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Monday, December 5, 2016, 04:48:UTC)(
22 July 2010
NEW YORK, New York -- British Prime Minister David 'Junior' Cameron admitted that he had always been 'a bit of a duffer' at history when he admitted he had forgotten which year the USA had entered into World War Two . Holding his school cap and rubbing his bottom after a severe caning from the Daily Mail, a contrite Cameron tried to brush off his mistake about the USA's entry date into the war.
It was entirely my fault. I thought the USA was with us in 1940 as I had learnt all my history watching Hollywood films during my early school days. When I saw Errol Flynn, John Wayne, Clark Gable and Donald Duck taking on the Nazi Beast and winning the war single handed, I was convinced that all the British did during that conflict was sit in air raid shelters and drink tea. Millions of young Americans lost their lives fighting for Freedom Fries across Europe and Asia whilst Britain was allowed to keep the cartons and empty coke bottles.
Cameron said his mistake anyone could understand and said that even the children he met today, were convinced the USA won both World War One and World War Two . If the British had been too busy eating cucumber sandwiches and the untrustworthy French kept disappearing for hours on end to entertain unmarried women in their private apartments. The Prime Minister was then asked if he remembered other times Britain and USA stood together against a common foe:
Ummm was it against France and Canada during the wars of Napoleon ? I am pretty sure the Americans were with us in the Crimean War and that one where all the Zulus came over the hill and were only stopped by Matt Damon and Vin Diesel. Anyway when it comes to history, I have always doubted the characters of those who like it. My ex-school colleague and the Mayor of London Boris Johnson is a good example. Great historian - lousy husband. I won't be making that mistake again!
Cameron's description of Britain as a junior to the USA was welcomed by the informative on-line knowledge data base, Conservapedia. It's spokesman, Andy Schlafly added:-
..finally a Brit that admits the truth! The English are the juniors now, a bunch of atheists with their funny spellings and socialist health care. Now their Prime Minister learns that the only way is the American way. My only regret that this recognition of facts has come when the USA is under the rule of an alien with a forged birth certificate and his Liberal-Marxist-Muslim elite.