UnNews:Identity theft up 8,000,000,000,000%
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|This article is part of UnNews||Straight talk, from straight faces|
14 December 2006
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The main cause of the increase is due to a technique known as "pfishing", in which the perpetrators sit by rivers, lakes and canals for hours at a time dangling sharp baited hooks in the water. A passing fish becomes snared by the hook, and is dragged from the water by its bleeding, shredded impaled lips and left to asphyxiate slowly in the unbreathable air. How this gets fraudsters the personal details of strangers is unknown, but presumably it works, otherwise they wouldn't do it.
Professor Nopanz, senior lecturer at the University of Watford and a leading expert on absolutely everything, was consulted on the rise of this trend. "It is because stupid people have started using the Intarweb. It is widely known that stupid people are the cause of all problems in the world." Professor Ihaff Nopanz (Date of birth 22 May 1975, favourite colour aubergine, mother's maiden name Haspanz) insists that the only way to eliminate online fraud is to force users to sit an IQ test before being allowed to start a web browser.
edit See Also
- "Please click this link to update your banking details". Your Bank, 14 December 2006