UnNews:Heath Ledger Wins Golden Globe, Thousands of 'Dying To Win' Puns Made
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Heath Ledger Wins Golden Globe, Thousands of 'Dying To Win' Puns Made
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Tuesday, August 22, 2017, 07:31:UTC)(
12 January 2009
Hollywood, CA. Heath Ledger, the actor made famous for his medieval shenanigans, being a gay cowboy, and most recently making Batman wet his pants on a semi regular basis, has won a Golden Globe for his work in making Batman laugh. The win for Ledger has prompted thousands of terrible puns from the film and news community, most of which involve the phrase "Dying to win it."
"I'm very proud" Heathcliff said after learning of his posthumous win "This is a Golden Globe for all of the people out there who ever said they were dying to go to senior prom with Jason From Geometry. This win represents just what you can achieve when you OD in a sleazy hotel."
When questioned for comment, Heath's father Mr. Ledger said "He always knew he was going to win it this way. Even when he was a young boy, he would tell me 'Dad, I'm dying to win a Golden Globe.' We laughed at the time, but little did we know how right he would turn out to be."
The Australian Film Association is also ecstatic at the news that a local has won the award. "Obviously, this win shows you that anything is possible when you're Australian" said the Australian Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd. "Clearly this makes us better than anybody else, after all, how many dead American actors do you see winning Golden Globe awards?"
After Ledger's win, many other dead actors have decided to work on new projects in the hope of securing the prestigious award, including the famous Judy Garland, who has been named as the newest Bond girl in the soon to be released adventure Film Noir Is Better Than Action Anyway.
"Well obviously I think I'm up to the job" Garland said yesterday, "I wouldn't be taking on the role otherwise. I think I'm in the best shape I've been in since The Wizard of Oz, and hopefully I can earn an award for Best Supporting Actress."
Uncyclopedia will continue to bring you more on dead actors and actresses as they take on more roles.,