UnNews:Hannah Monatana Unmasked as Russian Spy
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Hannah Monatana Unmasked as Russian Spy
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Wednesday, March 21, 2018, 05:31:UTC)(
16 March 2008
Los Angeles, California
Teen pop sensation Hannah Montana was today exposed as a Russian spy, real name Hannah Montanov.
British security agent George Miley said "We had observed Montanov as a crucial part of Putin's public relation's drive during his bid for power in the post Yeltsin era and were unsurprised when she emerged as a sleeper in US culture".
CIA spokesman Felix Cyrus said "We had Montanov under observation for many years, but it was her recent tour and use of a double during that tour that gave the game away. During the time when she was supposedly on stage - she was really undertaking clandestine operations at local military or industrial facilities."
The State Department indicated that she would be deported within the week.
Montanov's representatives immediately hit back with he following announcement: "Hannah Montanov will tour the Russian Federation during the course of 2008. Entitled 'The Best Of Both Worlds Tour', it will highlight the both the best of the of the old, great, Soviet Union and the supremacy and confidence of Medvedev's new, improved, Russian Federation"
The announcement was met by the rapturous joy of millions of Russian teen's who are likely to pack venues from Petersburg to Vladivostok .
- "Miley Cyrus Admits Fake Hannah Montana - 08 Rewind". antimusic.com, Dec 23, 2008