UnNews:Group of displaced Ghouls occupy Tenpenny Tower

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search
Group of displaced Ghouls occupy Tenpenny Tower

Fake News that's honestly fake

UnNews Logo Potato
Sunday, March 25, 2018, 05:41:59 (UTC)

F iconNewsroomAudio (staff)Foolitzer Prize

Feed-iconIndexesRandom story

28 December 2277


The catalyst for Occupy Tenpenny, Roy Phillips

Tenpenny Tower, Virginia - A group of displaced ghouls led by former police officer Roy Phillips have set up a protest camp around the perimeter of the luxury high-rise, Tenpenny Tower. The building, owned by English businessman Allistair Tenpenny, has the highest living standards of anywhere in the Capital Wasteland. The ghouls are protesting their appalling living conditions in the Warrington Subway tunnels and are demanding entry into the tower. Despite having enough caps to pay the rent at Tenpenny for both himself and his followers, Phillips was denied entry based only on the fact that he is a ghoul. "Can't those bigots tell the difference between us and the ferals" Phillips was quoted as saying.

Despite mounting pressure from the ghouls and their supporters, Allistair Tenpenny and his security team have no plans on allowing the ghouls access to the building. Chief Gustavo has issued a public statement released on Galaxy News Radio yesterday stating that "zombies will not be permitted to live in Tenpenny Tower". Many of the residents appear to feel the same way, expressing concerns about the smell of the ghouls as well as the fact that they may one day turn feral. Chief Gustavo believes that Roy may one day try something violent. Gustavo would not comment directly on what he thinks Phillips will do but an unnamed Tenpenny Security Guard told UnNews he thinks he may try to swarm the tower with packs of feral ghouls.

Some residents support the cause of the ghouls and would welcome them if they were allowed entry. One of the ghoul supporters is Herbert "Daring" Dashwood, a retired adventurer whose best friend was a ghoul. He remembers the discrimination his friend Argyle faced across the Capital Wasteland back in the 40s. During their travels together he remembers being shot at a few times by the racist wastelanders. "Things have gotten a bit better since those days" says Dashwood. "But we still have a long way to go before humans and non-feral ghouls can live side-by-side".

It is now the second week of the protest and their has been an almost complete media blackout on the Occupy Tenpenny movement. Enclave radio refuses to even report on the latest news out of the Tenpenny Tower. Instead they prefer to loop continuous recorded messages from President John Henry Eden. "That's nothing but propaganda" one protester remarked. The protester, who identified himself only has Gob, said that he travelled from nearby Megaton when he first learned of the protests on Galaxy News Radio, the only station broadcasting information regarding the movement. UnNews learned that several weeks ago, Gob shot and killed his former boss, Colin Moriarty, after years of abuse. This was done apparently with the blessing of the town's sheriff, one Lucas Simms. Because of the abuse suffered at Moriarty's hands, he says he knows the pain of his fellow ghouls and what they go through every day. Despite the abuse suffered by Moriarty, he says he was actually treated pretty well by the rest of the people in Megaton. He even managed to have sex with a human female in Megaton. "She was a whore yes but I'm not complaining, that was the first time I got laid in over 200 years".

The movement appears to be gaining momentum now that the media blackout has been lifted. Some big names in the Capital Wasteland have come out in support of the movement, including Regulator leader Sonora Cruz, Brotherhood of Steel leader Owyn Lyons, Megaton Sheriff Lucas Simms, the entire ghoul city of Underworld, Father Clifford, a priest from Rivet City, and a group of freed slaves lead by Hannibal Hamlin. Father Clifford actually travelled to the protest with two rivet city security guards to join the protest. Galaxy News Radio broadcaster Three Dog has also been very supportive of the movement and has been educating his listeners for years on the differences between feral and non-feral ghouls. He tells his listeners to leave their "pistols in their holsters" when encountering one of the "Capital Wastelands many (non-feral) ghouls".


Eli, the lone wanderer from Vault 101, has been a friend to the ghouls ever since he crawled out of that vault

Eli, the Lone Wanderer, has also been a strong supporter of ghouls and their cause. He became great friends with Charon from Underworld. He mourned for days after he was killed in Taft Tunnels when their party battled with Enclave soldiers and feral ghoul reavers. Charon took a few bullets from the Enclave but was decapitated by a feral ghoul reaver defending his friends. Although feral ghouls don't normally attack other ghouls, Charon died so Eli and his companions, including the scientist Madison Li, could live. Eli also attempted to convince the residents of Tenpenny Tower to allow Phillips and his followers to move in peacefully but was unable to do so because his speech and charisma skills were not high enough. His close friend Fawkes says he was thinking of trying again after raising some of his stats. He was reported to have been looking for speech and charisma bobbleheads and reading "Lying Congressional style".

Eli was not at the protest however, he is reported to be in serious condition in the Citadel infirmary. He was badly hurt in an explosion at the Jefferson Memorial on Christmas Day during a battle with Enclave forces. The battle, pitted Brotherhood of Steel forces against the Enclave, was decidedly won by the Brotherhood with the help of Eli, Fawkes, and the transformer Optimus Prime. Despite being victorious, several unnamed Brotherhood of Steel initiates were killed and both Sarah Lyons and Eli were seriously wounded. Fawkes, a friendly supermutant, sustained only minor injuries and travelled to Tenpenny to join in the protests after the Jefferson Memorial battle.

"As a supermutant, I understand what these ghouls are going through. I have it even worse then they do because as much as humans hate ghouls, they hate supermutants even more. Not that I can blame them, I don't like them either, and I am one. It's just a huge pain in the ass when I walk into a camp or a town and people just start shooting at me. It's a good thing my skin is so thick and the bullets don't go in too far or I would have been dead long ago. The Brotherhood knows who I am and I wouldn't usually get shot when Eli was with me but when I travel alone, thats when I'm in the most danger. Since Eli's in a coma and he's probably a vegetable now, I figured coming here was the natural thing to do". The ghouls have welcomed Fawkes, armed with a gatling gun, to their camp and say he is welcome to live at the Tower when they gain access. Uncle Leo a friend of Fawkes and the only other friendly super mutant in the wasteland has also been welcomed into the camp. Phillips has attempted to arm Leo as well telling him Fawkes has a spare gatling gun he picked up off an overlord but Leo refused telling Phillips he is a pacifist. Phillips accepted this and said a Rivet City security guard travelling with Father Clifford's entourage will wield the second weapon. Michael Masters, one of Phillips followers, says that the addition of Fawkes and his Gatling Guns have made the camp a lot safer.

During Christmas Eve Mass led by Father Clifford, two Deathclaws made their way into the camp, killing an unnamed Ghoul wastelander, an unnamed Underworld resident, and seriously injuring Roy's girlfriend Bessie Lyn. The 'Claws were killed by Phillips and Masters who were both armed with Chinese Assault Rifles. Lyn was treated at the camp by Doctor Barrows and is said to be in good condition. Barrows is a ghoul doctor who made the long trek from Underworld to Tenpenny. "With a Gatling gun, even deathclaws can be be killed in matter of seconds, Roy and I must have pumped about 200 rounds into each deathclaw before the bastards finally keeled over. It's weird though deathclaws don't normally come down this far, I wouldn't be surprised if Tenpenny had something to do with this" Masters commented. So far even more dangerous creatures such as albino radscorpions and Super Mutant Overlords have stayed away from the camp.

With the swelling number of protesters outside his gates and mounting pressure from law enforcement, the clergy, and now members of the media, Allistair Tenpenny and Chief Gustavo are being backed into a corner. Anthony Ling, a Tenpenny resident and Gustavo's occasional lover says he overheard Tenpenny and Gustavo considering hiring a regiment of the Talon Company to wipe out the protesters. Slave owner Eulogy Jones also has concerns about the protests and worries it may inspire his slaves to rise up against his rule. He is open to sending some of his slavers to Tenpenny to put down the protests. Colonel Augustus Autumn says he would like to send a regiment of his Enclave soldiers to the tower to help Tenpenny and the slavers but states that resources are spread very thin. "I may be able to spare a few soldiers but I have bigger problems now, like defending Adams Air Force Base against the Brotherhood". Bill Wilson of Andale says he would be willing to help Tenpenny get rid of some of the protesters but only on the condition that he can eat the bodies.

With the stunning loss of the Enclave at the Jefferson Memorial, the occupation of Tenpenny Tower, and now possible uprising in slaver camps, it appears that freedom and democracy my finally be on the march in the Capital Wasteland. This comes after 200 years of brutal anarchy, death, rape, murder, cannibalism, slavery, famine, and disease. Still it will be a long time before the Capital Wasteland returns to pre-War living conditions. Even if the slavers and Enclave are wiped off the Earth, the Wasteland still is full of raiders, super mutants, and hosts of dangerous mutated creatures. Things seem to be getting better but things are so bad in the wasteland that the only way things can go are up.

edit Sources

Personal tools