UnNews:Grinch steals all civic holidays, Whos celebrate regardless
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Grinch steals all civic holidays, Whos celebrate regardless
Straight talk, from straight faces
Wednesday, August 24, 2016, 06:56:UTC)(
21 October 2011
Whoville, NWO -- The Grinch, known for his distaste of feasting, gift exchange and other traditional forms of celebration, expanded his criminal empire today with the overnight acquisition of all halloween costumes and candies. According to his spokesman, his heart is still two sizes too small and unlike previous years there will be no re-distribution of stolen items or joyous carving of Who-beast roast by the Grinch in person. Undaunted, the singing Whos have taken to the streets and have restated their demands for the Grinch's heart to grow three sizes. Both sides seem to be in a deadlock as negotiations regarding stolen gifts from years past are unresolved at this time and the Grinch, according to Who legend, just "can't stand singing".
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