UnNews:Goldie Hawn: still the "golden girl"

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Goldie Hawn: still the "golden girl"

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25 May 2013


Too much sun? Not enough concealer? More makeup?

CANNES, South of France – Goldie Hawn, who starred in Laugh-In as the show's “golden girl” way back when, earning Big Bucks for the yuks she caused by playing as a giggling airhead, says, at 67, she's “just so grateful for makeup; otherwise, I'd look my true age.”

Hawn, whose main claim to fame is being Kate Hudson's mother, shacks up with Kurt Russell, a pool boy who made it big in films after Walt Disney Studios hired him to portray a pool boy who makes it big in films. In Hollywood, Hawn points out, “shacking up is considered the same as being married, as any gay couple, or Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, can tell you.”

She and “hubby” Russell attended the 66th Cannes Film Festival, Hawn said, “because we didn't have anything better to do: no one's offering either of us parts in movies nowadays.”

Hawn began her career as a cast-off member of Good Morning, World, a “show about nothing” that preceded Jerry Seinfeld's “show about nothing,” named for himself, by 22 years. She attended Blair Witch High School in Silver Spring, Maryland, learning to sign her name, before painting her body, such as it was, with a bikini and auditioning as herself, “a dumb blonde.”

She won an Academy Award in 1969 for her convincing role as the woman who drove her on-screen husband, played by the late Walter Matthau, to commit suicide. In 1985, she posed for Playboy magazine to prove, “once and for all,” that she is “not a transsexual,” as rumors contend.

She became a Buddhist in 1972 and has “nearly attained enlightenment.” Once she reaches nirvana, she plans to become a Scientologist.

DISCLAIMER: This article appears because it's a slow news day and because Unnews is seeking to sell advertising space to the following worthy organizations, for all of whom Hawn is willing to become a spokesperson “if the price is right”: Max Factor, Maybelline, L'Oreal, CoverGirl, American Society of Plastic Surgeons, and Association of American Retired Persons.

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