UnNews:God found alive, well and working on a much less ambitious project.
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God found alive, well and working on a much less ambitious project.
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Monday, February 8, 2016, 06:54:UTC)(
24 August 2008
Today in a shed at the bottom of Marge Phelp's Garden police found our Devine Creator working on a new washing machine powder. Humberside police were called to the Grimsby house after neighbours complained of strange smells from Mrs Phelps (87) garden shed. PC Ron Quick and WPC Anne Newton were first on the scene and when they opened the shed door were suprised to find a diety working in a candelestine laboratory. Terrorist specialists were called in but soon found that God was just working on a new washing powder not anything dangerous. God was said to be in good health and a little embarassed about the whole thing. "I should of registered my little lab with the Authorities" He said to reporters outside Grimbsby Police Station "the washing machine powder industry is worth £trillions in the UK, I have been a bit bored of late, since creating the earth and heavens I have only done a few films and the odd book so decided to work on a new whiter wash and make a few quid knocking it out at car boot sales".
God's Lawyers then covered him with a sports jacket and pushed him into the Car and drove off before we could ask him any more questions about the case. The Humberside Police Spokesman said "we are unlikely to press charges but God will be expected to pop down to Grimbsby Police station and make a Formal Apology to the Police for wasting their valuable time"
Eileen Panhandle reports for the Humberside Daily Echo