UnNews:French Rioters Come To Antarctica
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French Rioters Come To Antarctica
A newsstand that's brimming with issues
Friday, September 30, 2016, 01:32:UTC)(
PARIS: ANTARCTICA — Bored with peace and the EARTH, the "calm/sane" French Rioters in Paris decided to heat things up on the cold isle of Antarctica. Having burned all the cars there (total of 1), they turned to the Linux factory. Unfortunately, the darned thing building would not burn. High on gasoline and cognac fumes the wild mob started to molest penguins by the dozen. The dawn (6 months later) found rioters and several billions survived penguins fighting over the last remaining fish. Aphids were watching the whole thing from the distance with mild interest.
In the morning Linus Torvalds and the caring little PM John Howard flew in on unicycle to inspect the damage. Seeing that there was no reason to raise kernel panic he flew back to his secret headquarters
in Redmond, Microsoft Way 1. He did take some fresh penguin corpses which will be sold as Linux action figures, primarily for ages two and up (On Sale Now).