UnNews:Fox "Restructures"

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Fox "Restructures"

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Thursday, September 29, 2016, 23:55:59 (UTC)

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President of Fox, Old Man Rupert Murdoch, today announced he his going to restructure his news empire, NewsCorp. Some changes include:

Rupertmurdoch

Rupert Murdoch looking particularly foxy.

  • Removing Management and replacing them with Slavedrivers run by his Miniluv
  • Replacing all news stations with Minitru
  • Extending the poison pill for another 5000 years
  • Replacing the official NewsCorp language with Newspeak

He baffled reporters at a press conference by suddenly switching language to Newspeak to keep up with the times.

Today, is a new dawning for NewsCorp - Sorry, wait. I BB bellyfeel proles feel doubleplusungood Airstrip One and prolefeed. Proles go to Miniluv Room 101 speedwise for crimethink.

Aides of Rupert Murdoch attributed this recent bout of insanity to third stage syphilis, but none-the-less, NewsCorp is now known as Airstrip One.

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