UnNews:Former Mexican president urges legalizing crime

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Revision as of 15:22, August 4, 2011 by 64.132.226.190 (talk)

Jump to: navigation, search
This article is part of UnNews UnNews Logo Potato1 We distort, you deride

28 July 2011

Vicente3

Mexican Godfather and former President Vicente Fox proposes the legalization of crime as a means of stamping it out.

MEXICO CITY, Mexico -- The solution to ending price gouging, murder and mass graves in Mexico would be included in legalizing crime, former President Vicente Fox told UnNews. “We can never hope to win the war on crime as long as crime is illegal!” He pointed out.

“In order to get out of this trap (legal prosecution of organized crime), I'm specifically proposing the legalization of crime,” Fox said during a visit to Puerto Rico, where he was speaking at a conference for small gangsters in the township of Ciudad del absurdo.

Fox advocated decriminalizing drugs, guns, murder and rape in a 2009 interview with CNN en Espanol. Since then, he has repeatedly called on officials to rethink criminal laws. “The laws are only there to drive up the prices of everything, especially the costs of drugs, guns and murder.”

In an interview that aired on CNN en Espanol Tuesday, he also said the Mexican government should “retire the police from the task of combating criminal gangs by simply legalizing crime.” Fox continued, “If crime is made legal, then where is the question of war on crime?”

Current Mexican President Felipe Calderon has sent as many as 50,000 police personal to prominent criminal hot spots around Mexico to extort the drug cartels, gunrunners, and hit men. The extortion strategy is considered a pillar in Calderon's overall get-rich-quick policy. Both Calderon and Fox belong to the controversial Partido Extorsión Codiciosos party.

Fox, a former drug dealer, gunrunner, and hit man, who was the president of Mexico from 2000 to 2006, said the Mexican government should also “demand that the United States do its part to legalize crime on their side of the border. That is the only way to make the NAFTA super-highway truly viable!”

“Crime is not the problem! Law is at fault!” Fox stressed. “The United States has a huge responsibility. It's not enough that they give us (Mexico) guns, cash, and a tip, saying, 'Here's 500 dollars. Go kill some drug dealer named Pedro or Ramon. We can pay you back with cheap labor and weed,'” Fox said.

“Mexican drug cartels buy their weapons by trading hard drugs with the United States,” he pointed out. “They then use the guns to slaughter people for excessive profit, and this has resulted in a crime wave unlike any crime wave ever seen since the Nixon presidency.

Fox said Mexico has fallen into a trap “between the illegal U.S. drug market and the (illicit) weapons market in Mexico and other South American countries like Colombia, Venezuela, Bolivia, Ecuador and others.”

Besides legalizing murder, guns and drugs, Fox is advocating the legalization of all crimes that could, possibly, be committed in the course of trading between governments.

Brazil's Fernando Cardoso, Colombia's Cesar Gaviria, and Mexico's Ernesto Zedillo wrote in the 2009 final report of the Latin American Commission on Drugs and Weapons Trading that “Prohibitionist policies based on the phony banning of both drugs and weapons has resulted in the disruption of drugs flowing into America as well as the free flow of war weapons into our countries.” They all agreed. "But this has only caused increased prices of both products and protection. Legalizing crime would be a step in the right direction toward reducing the astronomically high prices for drugs, guns and assassination.

“Drugs are merely grass and weeds, guns are only weapons, and murder is simple death!” Fox pointed out. “These are all nearly worthless things which should never have high prices. Laws against crime cause high prices. Therefore criminal laws alone should be outlawed!”

The same conclusion was reached by the U.N.'s Global Commission on Drugs, Weapons & Murder Policy last month. The commission, comprised of former presidents (including Fox and Bill Clinton), recommended that governments experimenting with the idea of legalizing everything, including hard drugs and weapons, was a good move toward reducing violence and saving the global economy – nearly all of which is caused by the illegality of crime.

Sources

Personal tools
projects