UnNews:Female G spot "found just outside Colchester"
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Female G spot "found just outside Colchester"
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Thursday, January 19, 2017, 21:53:UTC)(
21 February 2008
THE MYSTERIOUS G SPOT, the almost mythical route to female sexual satisfaction, has allegedly been found in a suburb of an English town by Italian scientists. Some women claim that by stimulating them in the G spot a powerful orgasm can be triggered. Up to now the location of the G spot has remained as illusive as locating the fabled lost city of Sunderland.
Researchers have told Unnews magazine they found an area near the town of Colchester, Essex that could possibly hold the location of the G-spot. The last such claim was when Spanish scientists in 1956 claimed that the G-spot was located in the small Cornish fishing village of Polperro. The findings were later disproved after the alleged G-spot turned out to be a dead squid.
The existence of the G spot has remained controversial since the 1970s, when the dull town of Milton Keynes in a cynical attempt to encourage people to move there claimed to house the G-spot in a field near the main railway line. After 1000s had moved into the town the claims were eventually revealed to be a hoax after the G-spot turned out to be a few concrete cows, in a field.
Despite the claims work is yet to be finished in Colchester. The Italian researchers have said they need at least 100 local women to volunteer themselves for "intimate examinations" before the location of the G-spot may be conclusively proved. Dr Pizzarino Pepperotoni, lead researcher said, "there is much work to be done and we need to recruit many lovely young Essex women volunteers to help us prove this hypothesis, preferably ones with big tits."
The same researchers have conducted similar work in the towns of Northampton, Ipswich and Basingstoke. All towns were subsequently found NOT to contain the G-spot. However Dr Pizzarino Pepperotoni feels that Colchester is "the closest we've been" and is adamant that "we shall go through every woman in every town in England if necessary to find it."