UnNews:Tupac Shakur found alive in Dubai

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Tupac Shakur found alive in Dubai

Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?

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1 April 2013


Tupac Shakur seen here posing for a photo.

Dubai, United Arab Emirates -- Famous Rapper Tupac Shakur was found alive living in 35-story apartment building in Dubai.he was discovered when an American Journalist working for BBC accidentally discovered him while writing a story about life in Dubai.

"I couldn't believe I saw Tupac Shakur - at first I thought he was just another random black guy until I noticed he looked like Tupac the rapper! I then grabbed my phone and took a picture!" said journalist Michael Booker.

News crews responded quickly, running around in their odd vans with satellite dishes extending from the roofs, and stormed the building. As stated, Tupac was living under alias Mohamed Al-Asad and as a worker in a fish market.

WE interviewed Former Rapper Tupac on why he had faked his death (Tupac) "While I decided enough was enough, everybody wanted me dead, even the government so I hired a gunman to shoot me with specially-made bullets filled with red ink, and I payed all the doctors and forensics beforehand, and five days after my death I moved to Dubai in a private jet. It was fancier than how my aunt did it, anyway.".So there you have it: Tupac was alive all this long.

Tupac's aunt is mainly known for sinking her fangs into New Jersey policemen, getting blamed for every criminal thing that occurred in New York and New Jersey in the early-mid 1970s, and worming her way out of New Jersey concentration camps. She is also known for running away to Cuba, possibly using the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle.

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