UnNews:Extremely notable wiki files DMWVA lawsuit

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7 March 2006

Obscurechemics

"Duh! Who cares? Cough! Who dares?"

CHRISTMAS ISLES, SOMEWHERE - The IRC Collaborative Authority Battling Against Lawsuits has been thrown into chaos and panic after receiving an encrypted datagram from a respectful wiki propagating white as the only true color of the Monobook skin (known as Uncyclopedia on Uncyclopedia). It turned out that a recent hacking attempt made by two Uncyclopedia users (codenamed "59646f63" and "44617262") to breach the security of this lame web design wiki and replace the background color with black has been misunderstood.

It turned out that they mistyped the IP address (164.236.0.65 for supersecret.norad.mil instead of 165.236.0.65 for whitemonobook.wiki.cx) and nearly provoked a global thermonuclear war. The CIA immediately traced the hackers to the toilets they were sitting inside 24/7, acquired fingerprints from their notebooks' touchpads and thrudged through the entire Interweb, starting with their del.icio.us bookmarks and Livejournal mind garbage. In 24 hours, all their private life has become public knowledge, as the CIA immediately posted all information at their disposal on the wiki in question. This caused a massive server overload around Islands-that-Nobody-Cares-About, to the point of the admins being forced to implement advanced security measures - namely rendering the wiki read-only and disabling all editing functionality forever.

In turn mistaking CIA agents for their own staff (no, mind control has nothing to do with that, mind y- *flash*), the wiki administrators filed a DMWVA (Digital Millennium Wiki Vandalism Act) lawsuit against Uncyclopedia, demanding a bannination period no less than half of that permitted by law, namely infinity. At this point, Uncyclopedia refuses to extradite its citizens, insisting on their status as political refugees. UnNews continues to overwatch this growing controversy, continuously reloading all 59 Google links mentioning the controversial wiki.

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