UnNews:Estonian Wiki suffers extensive vandalism, blames Russians
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|This article is part of UnNews||We distort, you deride|
18 May 2007
TALLINN, Estonia -- Just today, the official Wiki of Estonia had come under heavy attack from mysterious vandals. Numbering at over fifty, they have been reported to have struck at over 2500 unique articles. Most of them employed typical vandalism tactics such as blanking and inserting pictures of traditional Russian men, though some went so far to spam the ever-more-shocking images of traditional Russian women.
Reaction to the event was at first confused, since the inexperienced administrators of the site were not used to an invasion of such magnitude. Nevertheless, in a matter of hours the situation was contained, but the damage was already done.
"To say this invasion was unprecedented is an understatement" said loyal contributor Anu Hevereeven following the attack, "Believe me, I was there when it happened. I was just minding my own business, editing the article on the Pulli Settlement, when all of a sudden my edit got conflicted with another's... and it was no ordinary edit, I tell you." Anu's family fears she may have been struck with post-invasion stress syndrome, and plans on having a professional see her before it's too late
Anu and about a dozen other contributors and admins fought the invaders in a bitter revert war for over five straight hours before the vandals retreated off their laptops. The Estonians may have won the battle, but they fear this is the start of what they have dubbed a "Cyber War" with the mysterious vandals. None were seriously harmed in the skirmish, though one invader planted a small worm into the computers of two valiant defenders during the confusion.
In preparations for this possible war, the admins first had to discover who the enemies are, and they weren't shocked to behold that they hailed from their bitter rivals: the Official RussoWiki. The Russians had been seen bragging about an event larger than any 4chan mustering was about to happen just weeks before, but no one took their threats seriously. Site proprietor and Estonian government official Rue Regrütteberg laments ignoring their threats.
"Why didn't we take them seriously? Why?! WHYYYY!!!!" Rue said whilst throwing his fists into the air and dropping to his knees. After giving a half hour to settle down, he had this to say: "This means war!"
No action has taken place yet, but only time will tell how fast this Cyber War will escalate.
- Gustav Vooderhaven "Russians launch Cyber War on Estonia, neighboring Germans fear the Wurst". The Swedish Fish, May 18, 2007