UnNews:Duceppe promotes unity
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Duceppe promotes unity
Every time you think, you weaken the nation —Moe Howard
Friday, September 30, 2016, 13:34:UTC)(
13 May 2007
MONTREAL, Canada -- Bloc Québécois leader Gilles Duceppe made a stunning announcement Saturday when he reversed his decision to run for the leadership of the provincial Parti Québécois, now that Pauline Marois has also announced her candidacy. "The significant and rapid support gathered by Pauline Marois - not only within the Parti Québécois but within the Bloc Québécois and among the general public - means I don't have a hope in hell of winning anyway," he stated. "I would never want to run for the leadership of any political party, knowing I had little or no chance of winning that leadership with the aim of forming a government."
In further explaining the rationale for his decision, Duceppe added: "It's time for a woman, and one of quality...the message 'Pauline in Québec, Gilles in Ottawa' also carried sway. As in a good marriage, we will be living far apart."
Friends praised Duceppe for his maturity in making the personal sacrifice necessary to keep everyone united. "Gilles understands that it's better to avoid a bitter leadership contest. In politics, everything works better when we show maturity and tolerate differences rather than engaging in political wrangling," noted former BQ and PQ leader Lucien Bouchard. Former PQ leader Jacques Parizeau added, "He is right to avoid a clash and focus on what we in the sovereignist movement have in common. As a staunch separatist he has just shown us all that he is completely committed to unity."