UnNews:Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell publically profess love for one another, plan to marry
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Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell publically profess love for one another, plan to marry
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Sunday, November 29, 2015, 05:23:UTC)(
22 December 2006
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NEW YORK, New York (UNN) -- Rosie O'Donnell had some kind words for Donald Trump on the View Wednesday after Donald decided to marry O'Donnell instead of Miss USA, Tara Conner. When the Donald heard this he publicly announced that Rosie is the most amazing woman he has ever met and that the two of them plan to wed sometime in the new year.
The Donald was quoted as saying "I can't wait to marry Rosie it will be fun. Rosie's a hottie. A real hottie. I will have lots of fun making love to my beautiful Rosie". Rosie was quoted as saying that Trump was a perfect role model for all of America's youth. Rosie also praised Trump's compassion when he allowed Miss USA to keep her crown after it was discovered that she had consumed several alcoholic beverages at a night club.
Miss USA is supposed to be a perfect role model for all American children but Tara Conner had consumed alcohol at the age of 20. The legal drinking age in America is 21 because 19 and 20 year olds don't have the emotional and cognitive maturity to consume alcoholic beverages. Other countries have drinking ages that range from 16 to 19 but this is regarded as much too liberal by the all knowing American government. In addition from abstaining from alcohol, Miss USA is also not allowed to have sex despite being stripped naked and put on display in public. There are also allegations that males had their way with both Miss USA and Miss Teen USA, although these allegations can not be proven.
Despite her misbehaviour though, the Donald forgave Miss USA for her transgressions saying that "God forgives sins" and that Miss USA can not be expected to " live up to my high moral standards". It was this mercy and compassion that attracts Rosie so much to the Donald.
Trump and Rosie spend the night together at one of Trump's mansions. Rosie was said she was touched and that she "did enjoy him".