Dolphins upset with Trump's 'anti-flipper' comments

Democracy Dies with Dignity

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Thursday, November 15, 2018, 12:08:59 (UTC)

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26 August 2018


Flipper v Donald Trump.

WASHINGTON, D.C., USA -- President Donald Trump's claim that he doesn't 'like flippers' and wants to change the law to ban them has upset the dolphin community.

Fin McDolphin and Noisy Squealer - speaking on behalf of the Dolphin Entertainers Union - both criticised Trump for his comments on flippers. In between fish treats and nose stroking, Fin McDolphin said:

I voted for Trump in 2016 as he was against sharks and promised we would get more fish. Now he's attacking dolphins and especially Flipper, the best of our species who made us into regular attractions for humans. We will lobby Trump the next time he is at Mar-a-Lago in Florida with an organised high pitch mass squeak.

His partner and colleague Noisy added:

I also voted for Trump and feel the same way as my husband. Dolphins are true American patriots. We think having flippers is a positive, not negative. Otherwise swimming would be difficult.


No fish for these unpatriotic dolphins

The White House hasn't indicated if it will meet the dolphins or just find them more fish to go away. Just as long they 'don't take the Knee' (a reference to the Miami Dolphins football team).

Update: Trump has refused to supply extra fish unless 'those songs of bitches stop taking the knee during the national anthem'.

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