UnNews:Democrats gleeful over GOP child haters
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Democrats gleeful over GOP child haters
Your A.D.D. news outl — Oooh, look at the pictures!
Thursday, May 26, 2016, 02:54:UTC)(
3 October 2007
WASHINGTON - Democrat Eric Massa couldn't believe his good fortune last week when his potential opponent, Rep. Randy Kuhl, a Republican from upstate New York, voted against the expansion of the State Children's Health Insurance Plans (SCHIP). "What a total dicktard," laughed Massa. "Voting against sick children? He just handed his seat to me on a silver platter!"
Massa wasted no time broadcasting Kuhl's heartless vote in the district, which stretches from near Lake Ontario to the Pennsylvania border. The next night at a house party in Naples, New York, he told supporters how Kuhl's vote represented the worst of the Republican Party: sick child hated, worshipping the Devil, money-grubbing, cruelty and "other stuff you don't even want to know about."
Democrats are saying the child-hating comes straight from the top, President Bush, who they say has been known to kick the crutches out from under cancer kids. Many observers think it will come back to haunt the entire G.O.P. a year from now. While the bill passed both chambers of Congress with relatively strong bipartisan support, it failed to get enough votes in the House to override President Bush's veto, which he issued Wednesday morning.
Bush tried to cover how much he despises poor little sick children by saying the bill, by raising the income eligibility levels, would draw children away from private insurance plans and act as a first step toward socialized medicine. Yeah, right!
Democrats know that ideological debates are no match for pictures of sick children, and they are already training their sights on eight vulnerable Republicans, including Kuhl, who voted against it. "We need pictures of sick kids, stat!" hollered Representative Chris Van Hollen, a Maryland Democrat and head of the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee. "This is Christmas come early!"