UnNews:Corbyn re-elected Labour leader
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Corbyn re-elected Labour leader
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Sunday, August 20, 2017, 15:56:UTC)(
26 September 2016
LIVERPOOL, United Kingdom -- Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn confirmed that the party were back on "their long and winding march" to power following the defeat of the Blairite counter-revolutionary faction in Liverpool.
Corbyn received 60% of the votes cast by eligible Marxist members in the party. Addressing the workers, peasants, students, and Mexicans in the audience, Corbyn pledged he would return to the class-war struggle against the capitalist roaders — starting with his own Labour MPs and disgraced former party leaders Tony 'Assassin of the Workers' Blair and Gordon 'Bully' Brown. Once they had been purged, bleached, and wrung out to dry, he would then take on British Prime Minister Theresa May — some time in the 2020s.
"Make no mistake, comrades," said Corbyn, "until we have scrubbed clean our own party of Tories, Liberals and so-called Social Democrats can we then take on our open enemies. The British people will then come to us and vote in their millions for a New Socialist Era."
The fate of the Labour Party's internal enemies was resolved by an informal vote, in which the winner was "lamp posts."
- Staff "McDonnell refuses to apologise about 'lynching' MPs". The Independent, September 25, 2016