UnNews:California heat-wave deadly; Antarctica heat-wave deadlier
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|This article is part of UnNews||Your A.D.D. news outl — Oooh, look at the pictures!|
28 July 2006
IGLOO, Antarctica (AP) -- The heat-wave striking most of California, particularly in the Fresno area, has recently topped death tolls at over 120. Reports indicate that a majority of those dead, died.
One Fresno man reportedly pretended to act deceased, just so that he could have himself placed in a walk-in freezer at the city morgue. He later died from hypothermia.
However, the heat-wave in most of the United States is nothing in comparison to that which is being felt in Antarctica. In the last week, Antarctica broke four heat records. Chief Meteorologist Darryl Quimby stated, "Typically, temperatures around this time of the year are in the -30's (Farenheit), now we're looking at a massive heat-wave as temperatures are around the -20's."
Although nobody has died from the heat-wave in Antarctica, the sudden rise in temperatures has many alarmed. Most Antarcticans say that they'll start turning their AC on when it starts to get around -10. "A real squelcher," says one Antarctican resident, "I'm considering wearing shorts next season."