UnNews:Bush will not be rushed into decision
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Bush will not be rushed into decision
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Friday, May 6, 2016, 08:04:UTC)(
20 December 2006
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Bush said Wednesday he would "not be rushed" into a decision on a Christmas present for First Lady Laura Bush, saying that in a round of consultations he heard both some interesting ideas and some "ideas that would make it appear I'm a metrosexual."
"And I reject those ideas." Bush said after meeting with top design and fashion Department officials.
He said those ideas included "leaving Opera tickets in her cereal bowl, ideas such as not wearing the same blue suit with red tie over and over."
Bush spoke with reporters after wrapping up a round of high-level talks on revising his Christmas shopping list.
Earlier he spoke by telephone with two Kazakhstan leaders as part of what the White House called efforts to forge an "understanding" about how to make wine from ferment horse urine. "Laura likes her wine", Bush said, "and I heard about this in a movie."
Standing with the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Bush said he and the nation's top military commanders had "a very candid and fruitful discussion about how to reveal the softer side of myself without looking like a pansy."
Although the White House had initially suggested that Bush would deliver his present to Laura before Christmas, he has decided to delay it until early next year.
Defending that decision, Bush said, "I will not be rushed into making a difficult decision ... a necessary decision."
Asked by a reporter if recommendations made a week ago by the bipartisan POTUS Christmas List Study Group included some of the bad advice he had cited, Bush said that his opinion of the report "hasn't changed."
"I thought it was interesting that Metros and Men's Men could work in concert to help achieve an objective," Bush said. The panel was headed by fashion expert Carson Kressley and tough guy Chuck Norris.