UnNews:Bush declares war on terradactyls
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Bush declares war on terradactyls
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Tuesday, July 28, 2015, 16:08:UTC)(
25 July 2007
Washington D.C., U.S.A. –- President George W. Bush announced a further security crackdown today with the announcement of a new "war on terradactyls."
At a press conference on the White House lawn, President Bush said: ‘No longer will we tolerate terradactyls terrorizing our towns and cities, carrying off our children and generally making a nuisance of themselves.’
To counter the threat the President further ordered that New York City, a prime target for terradactyl attacks, be immediately covered in high tensile netting as a defense against attacks from the air. Christened the “Net Of Steel” by experts, the structure is scheduled for completion in late 2008.
Amidst concerns that the new security measure might disrupt air travel a Federal Aviation Authority (FAA) spokesman claimed the impact would be minimal, ‘A lot of people aren’t flying right now for fear of terradactyl attacks,’ he said ‘international visitor numbers are also down as most foreign nationals are criminals who won’t come to America because the FBI will catch them.’