UnNews:Bush Sr. to join RAF
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Bush Sr. to join RAF
Straight talk, from straight faces
Tuesday, December 1, 2015, 06:37:UTC)(
12 June 2009
PETERBOROUGH, England -- In keeping tradition with a birthday tradition which he has upheld every five years, Former President George Bush Sr., today announced his intention to join the United Kingdom's RAF Squad. Previous attempts, on his 75th and 80th birthday, resulted in the Former President being refused entry due to his age and lack of good health however he refused to acknowledge that he may receive the same response this year too.
Since the end of his presidential term in 1993 Bush has, for the most part, remained out of the media spotlight. Due to various medical issues, brought about by the election of Bill Clinton, he felt it was more appropriate for his son George Bush to take on the family business of Presidency and allow a 50/50 share of power so that he could enjoy his 'retirement' in peace. More recently though it was unearthed that Bush Sr. had been looking to reignite his military career once he had moved out of the White House.
During World War II Bush had served in the U.S. Navy however since his submarine license had long expired, he had been looking for an alternative option when he had spotted an RAF advert on television, he talked us through one of his recollections at a conference held at the Training Centre in north England, "I was watching the BBC News channel, I love watching that British stuff, although I mostly watch it 'cause of Fiona Bruce. It must of been 2002, or thereabouts, I know George Jr. was in Office and that the World Trade Center attacks had recently taken place so I was like 'Shit, I gotta get out of this game, yo'. Anyways, one of those adverts came on, the ones that are filmed with hand-held cameras and look as though they're filming real battle and it looked so cool. I knew I had to do it." It seems that Bush used his contacts in the British Royal Family to get himself an interview, however weeks before he contracted pneumonia and was refused entry due to his unfit health.
Prince Harry, Bush's contact and friend, had been the one to set up the interview between Bush and the RAF Squadron Leader; in a recorded video which had been sent to George he had explained the closeness of the relationship. "Well me and George went way back, I often played with George Jr. when I was younger and so I was used to doing favours for him. I know that he is intent on living the American Dream and if that means serving Her Majesty in the RAF, then I don't see why anyone or anything should stop him." After his first refusal, ten years ago, a website was set up in order to raise funds to buy Bush Sr.'s RAF uniform in an attempt to portray an organised and determined gentleman. However the website had to be closed down when it was found that the money which had been donated via Paypal hadn't even been enough to cover the cost of renting the domain. As a result the uniform was not bought and Bush was again denied entry.
This year, however, Bush Sr. has reached a milestone, having got as far as the training process on his journey to the front line. No one is willing to say how far they believe the Former President will go as at his old age, his mental stability and judgment have been called into question suggesting that maybe his opportunity will once again be taken from him.