UnNews:Bulma Poses Nude For Playboy
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Bulma Poses Nude For Playboy
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Monday, August 3, 2015, 13:51:UTC)(
14 November 2011
Spokompton, Washington --
A month ago, Bulma Briefs, the inventor of the "Dragon Radar" and the gorgeous daughter the of the world famous Scientist Doctor Briefs of Capsule Corporation, has agreed to pose fully nude for Playboy magazine. The news first broke when Playboy announced it in their last issue.
The news did not settle too well with the company, the Briefs family, or the stock markets. Capsule Corporation has already had a bad year. As of late, the stocks have fallen substantially due to a capsule containing faulty Oscar Wilde Quotes. Not only is this faulty product the cause of lowering stock value, but due to Bulma's recent erotic decision, Christian investors have pulled all their money out of the company, sinking the company even further. Doctor Briefs stated that he was absolutely furious with his daughters irresponsible decision and that he has cut her off from the family funds. Bulma has since taken residency with Doctor Briefs' scientific rival, Doctor Gero. This has not been bad news for everyone though, since Playboy has received record profits from pre-orders and subscription purchases in the last week. "It has been a good year, and an even better week" says Hugh Hefner of Playboy Magazine.
When questioned by reporters, Bulma stated that she thought it would be a fun and kinky way to sexually express herself and that she thought her fans would appreciate the gesture. Bulma also went on to say that she is not sorry nor is she ashamed of her choice and that the Christian investors can "Blow it out their asses". Even though the situation looks grim, Bulma hopes to regain her family's approval (and funds) or at least their forgiveness. It is apparent though, that magazine sales are going to skyrocket, in addition to pre-sales, in store sales are going to attribute a decent amount.
Playboy estimates that they will earn over $9000 dollars per state this upcoming week. The magazine is due for release on November 15, 2011. Bulma has released a preview, a partially nude photo on her Twitter account, she has since gained thousands of followers. No matter what the outcome of Capsule Corporation's stock woes, or the family's alienation of Bulma, fans nationwide will be satisfied for a long time.
|This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.|