UnNews:Bull of TV's "Night Court" goes on 7-hour rampage
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Bull of TV's "Night Court" goes on 7-hour rampage
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Wednesday, September 2, 2015, 11:46:UTC)(
10 October 2006
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== WARNING: This article is mainly American and may, therefore, be completely unfunny.==
NEW DELHI, India - Actor Richard Moll, best known to television audiences as dimwitted bailiff Bull Shannon on the sitcom Night Court, went on a 7-hour rampage yesterday. Nobody is exactly sure why, but police investigators suspect it may have something to do with a suppressed neurosis, concerns about the North Korean nuclear test, and the accidental inhalation of toasted monkey brain extract.
Moll, 63, was seen in full Bull Shannon costume, shaved head intact, running around the streets, screaming, "ME HATE THE TREES! ME HATE THE TREES!!!"
His partner-in-crime was his twin brother, Burt from Sesame Street. Moll had taken an airplane to New Dehli two weeks ago to see his grandfather's karate teacher, Mr. Miyagi.
The Police -- Sting, Andy Summers, and Stewart Copeland -- were notified immediately, and Moll was taken to a nearby discount mental hospital. Nobody was hurt, but news anchors were laughing hysterically; Larry King kept laughing for a full hour on his popular CNN talk show, until a large crevass opened in his face and nearly a dozen demons from Hell flew out.
No charges have been filed against Moll or Burt.
This article has been brought to you by the letters WTF.
- Leroy Finklestein "Bull from "Night Court" goes on rampage!". The Associated Press, October 09, 2006
- Harold Potter "Bull, of TV's "Night Court", goes on 7-hour rampage". Yahoo! News, October 09, 2006