UnNews:Boy 3D prints replacement head for beloved cat
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Boy 3D prints replacement head for beloved cat
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Friday, December 2, 2016, 20:16:UTC)(
23 March 2014
BIRMINGHAM, Alabama -- Following a tragic accident involving a Cuisinart and young Leroy Brickson's eleven-year-old cat, the boy successfully employed the emerging 3D printing technology to help his injured pet. The animal was accidentally beheaded while twelve-year-old Leroy left the blender unattended while making mullet paste for his elderly grandmother who is a double-amputee. "Pussy-Whip just stuck his big-ole head down in there while the mullet was grinding," a wide-eyed Leroy stated. "By the time I snatched him out his head was pulled clean off his neck and was just spinnin' round in the blender bucket. I was absolutely horrified," he continued in his slow drawl.
Fortunately for Pussy-Whip, Leroy's 22-year-old-sister Shanikwa is a talented CAD designer and owns a Makerflop Rescutator 3D printer which she uses for making hair weave clamping devices which she distributes to needy homeless people without access to hair-care products. "Now Pussy-Whip got a plastic head!" Leroy exclaimed. "Me and Shanikwa made him a blue one and she weaved it on his hair."
Although apparently still traumatized from his injury, Pussy-Whip is now complete again and lies quietly on Shanikwa's lap as Leroy gently strokes his new blue plastic head. "I think I'm gonna make Grama some new plastic legs now," Shanikwa stated enthusiastically. "We goin' to have to keep her away from that blender though," she added.
|This article features first-hand journalism by an UnNews correspondent.|