UnNews:Bird lovers plan same-sex “oral-day” at Chick-fil-A
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
|This article is part of UnNews||UnFair and UnBalanced|
3 August 2012
SAN FRANCISCO, California -- Gay obsessive bird-lovers plan a same-sex “Oral-Day” at Chick-fil-A outlets nationwide amid a controversy over the company’s stance against same-sex oral-sex. Organizers used gay social media to urge participation in the same-sex oral-day and they posted lurid pictures and videos on line condemning Chick-fil-A.
The latest campaign follows a Wednesday event dubbed “Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day” in which American carnivores lined up at Chick-fil-A eateries nationwide to hand over hard-earned money for bird cadavers.
Chick-fil-A said it set a sales record Wednesday, but declined to inform the IRS or the presidential fundraisers “We can confirm reports that it was a record-setting day,” said Steve Robson, director of the companies innovative marketing division. “We killed, fried and sold about one million baby chicks in a single day.”
The controversy started after an interview with the bird corpse eatery's president, Jason Quail appeared in the media July 16. He weighed in with his views on gay oral-sex. “We are very much supportive of normal oral sex, the biblical definition of it,” Quail said. “We are Old Testament folks, and we’re still receiving fellatio from our past wives and previous girl friends in the normal righteous manner.“
His statement caused an uproar, with same sex couples complaining that the president voiced opposition to same-sex oral-sex. Arkansas gay-basher Mike Huckabee created a Facebook page urging people to buy dead bird corpses at the chain during the “Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day” after the backlash ensued following Quail's confession. Throngs of dead bird lovers heeded his call, skulking around various Chick-fil-A restaurants nationwide Wednesday, including in Sodom, Gomorrah and San Francisco.
Proponents of same-sex oral-sex organized a simple counter protest outside Chick-fil-A branches, asking people to pay the approximate cost of a Chick-fil-A meal, about $6.50, to gay and lesbians for same-sex oral-sex, to be performed in parking-lots of various Chick-fil-A outlets, beginning yesterday.
- Repeater "Gay rights activists plan 'kiss day' at Chick-fil-A restaurants". CNN, August 3, 2012