UnNews:Apple Buys Out Uncyclopedia
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Apple Buys Out Uncyclopedia
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Monday, October 24, 2016, 18:36:UTC)(
1 April 2006
|UnNews Audio (file info)|
|Listen to this story!|
Problems playing this file? You might be a dope.
Uncyclopedia Headquarters, Parts Unknown - Apple Computer, inc, has today completed its buyout of Uncyclopedia, the world's premier source of misinformation. The details of the buyout are not officially known, but sources suggest that the trade may have been worth as much as $620 million.
Apple will be bringing sweeping reform to the wiki, effective immediately. Already the wiki has been rebranded iHumor, and the site has taken the familiar appearance of Apple's website. Apple have also started a series of "Switch" advertisements, encouraging people to make the change from their old outdated wikis to iHumor. Many users, to be referred to now as iHumorons, even broke with the tradition of complate apathy to comment on the new developments -
One of the most eargerly-anticipated new features Apple will be bringing to iHumor is the revolutionary Wilde Kernel, a powerful multi-layered open source humor engine. Also with the new ownership come several other new features: a store, where you can purchase all sorts of new iHumor NRV-brand merchandise, an iHumor addon - iHumor plus!!, and a limited edition one-of-a-kind special edition NRV-brand EuroiPod, available free with every $150 donation to iHumor.
"SO HOW ABOUT THAT AQUIREASEATION LOL ROFL!!1 WER DO I SNDE MY COOPONS!?".
- ~ Cctoide
It is not yet known exactly what direction Apple is planning on taking iHumor, or for what reason they bought Uncyclopedia in the first place. Many experts predict an iTunes-style store where articles are offered for download for only a few cents each onto users' EuroiPods, enabling the iHumorons to experience humor on the go.