UnNews:A good strong talking to solves Middle East problems.
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A good strong talking to solves Middle East problems.
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Tuesday, February 9, 2016, 07:12:UTC)(
7 January 2008
Principal: Boys you have both been very naughty. Do you know why I have brought you to my office?
USA: But.. but.. but he said he had a Nu.. nuclear enrichy-man plan-
Principal: No, I don't want to hear your excuses. Why have I brought you here?
Principal: What? Speak up.
Principal: Yes you do. Where's Iran?
Principal: Oh Iran! Stop taunting Israel and get over here!
Principal: So Iran, do you know why you're here?
Iran: Na-ah stupid infidel
Principal: USA, stop trying to hit Iran. Now you both know why I brought you here.
USA: But he said he was makin' a Nuclear wor.. warhead. I don' want him to have one!!! North Korea got one and now he's gonna get one!! WAHHHH
Principal: Now, USA. Remember what happened between you and Iraq?
Principal: He still beats you up, doesn't he?
Principal: We don't want that to happen again, do we?
Principal: Don't pretend you're innocent, you've been mocking him for ages.
Principal: Yes. You've been trying to get Iraq to do your dirty work for you, haven't you?
Iran: But, but, but.
Principal: Do you even have any warheads?
Iran: Nah.. but Russia gave me something so I can make some.
Principal: Oh that Russia, he's been acting so high and mighty!
USA: He's also been real mean to me.
Principal: Not many kids seem to like you USA.
USA: Israel does.
Principal: That explains alot... Venezuela, stop making faces at USA.
Principal: Has Mrs. U.N done anything about this?
USA: Nah, she just sleeps all the time.
Principal: Ok.. um.. USA stop threatening Iran.
USA: stupid old man
Principal: Iran stop mocking USA
Iran: infidel dummy
Principal: And can someone please stop Israel hitting Palestine!
USA: Nah... they've been doing that for ages.