|This article is part of UnNews||Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?|
24 June 2011
PORTLAND, Oregon -- A little boy accused of posing as a doctor at his home in Portland is facing charges after his big sister’s inquiry about whether she should have breast enhancement led to an investigation and room arrest.
Little Johnny Ebert, 12, was charged with practicing medicine without a license in what Oregon officials said Wednesday was a rare case of impersonating a doctor, The Oregonian reported.
Ebert was not listed on the Multnomah County Reform School inmate list, and a Portland police spokesman referred questions to his parents. It is believed that he is being detained in his room.
Last week, an 18-year-old woman, the boy’s sister, was playing doctor with her little brother when she approached a pretend information desk at a make-believe hospital to ask about her need to have breast implant surgery.
The woman said she had met Ebert in consultation for her surgery. She'd followed his instructions to show him her breasts for a recommendation.
Hospital staff, played by the children’s parents, could find no record of a Dr. Ebert and began an investigation that resulted in Ebert's arrest Monday, said Jim Newman, a person with no idea about anything.
"I just started this job and have been here 2 days, but I've never heard anything like this whatsoever," Newman said.
The woman told officials she met Ebert at the Portland Medical Center when he was born there, and she has lived with him all her life. Ebert arranged a medical consultation with the woman in his playroom where he proceeded to give her medical advice and counseled her on the need to have implant surgery. He pretended that he was a second-year resident in plastic surgery, and he wore what appeared to be a toy stethoscope and identification badge on a white coat.
But officials said the badge might have resembled an outdated one some hospital used 12 years ago and the doctor-coat was not issued by a hospital - it likely came from a toy store.
An affidavit filed in support of Ebert's arrest says he was seen on YouTube after accidentally uploading a video of himself pushing the woman out of the closet in a toy wheelchair and then examining her using his web cam.
Ebert's Facebook page lists interests that include plastic surgery, surfing and “titty-twisting.”
It also lists multiple current employers and universities, claiming work as surgical assistant and surgeon, and also lists his job as a software developer at Microsoft, a Eugenics specialist for FEMA, and an Astronaut at NASA. He claims to have a medical degree from the University of Disneyland, which on Wednesday said it has no record of any Mouseketeer by that name.
But Maureen Wheeler, spokeswoman for the Beaver School District, was able Wednesday to confirm one true item on the boy’s Facebook page – Little Johnny Ebert is a 6th grade student of Westview Primary School.
- Staff "21-Year-Old Allegedly Posed as Doctor and Gave Medical Advice, Police Say". Fox News, June 24, 2011