UnNews:'Kids should be allowed to smoke' says Governor Schwarzenegger
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
'Kids should be allowed to smoke' says Governor Schwarzenegger
Who knew The Onion® had a retarded stepbrother?
Thursday, July 2, 2015, 18:34:UTC)(
12 July 2008
LOS ANGELES, California - Governor Schwarzenegger today in a press conference, announced that he will be taking steps to encourage California kids to take up smoking, and to make it acceptable for them to do so while in school, church, and at home. The governator believes that this will give children a first hand experience with smoking, and allow them to experiment on their own, and hopefully reduce the amount of people killed due to driving while smoking incidents each year, as well as making the children look "totally badass," as put by Schwarzenegger.
|We need to allow children to experiment with smoking before becoming legal driving age, so that they can figure out how to manage the amount they smoke, and make sure that they have not smoked a lot before, or during a car ride, and hopefully that will decrease the amount of fatalities while teens drive. That is why I am pleading to parents not to discourage your children from smoking, instead encourage them. And to convenience store clerks, do not succumb to peer pressure, put up more tobacco signs, It will only encourage the children to give it a try, and that is what we want.|
—Governor Schwarzenegger. Expertly translated by Philip Shaw.
Response to Schwarzenegger's proposition has been generally positive. Many people believe that this should not be just kept to the state of California, and should be raised to a nation-wide law that requires children as young as 8 to begin smoking. However, as all great propositions have, this one has a group closely following it in order to unveil the evil it could do to the world. The National Association of Grannies (NAG) has begun protesting the white house, claiming that it will picket all convenient stores in America if Washington does so much as even consider passing this law. The protests have begun getting violent, and many leaders of NAG have been incarcerated including the high profile leader of NAG, Jessica Johnson, who was released shortly after on bail.
Governor Schwarzenegger is expected to address the issue of NAG tomorrow night.