UnNews:"Bungee Saddam" wins 2006 Political Ad Of The Year
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
This article is part of UnNews, your source for up-to-the-microsecond misinformation.
31 December 2006
IF YOU'RE in Marketing, Just Kill Yourself (Seriously) — The Republican Party stormed home the winner this year for Best Party Political Advertisement with the long-running Bungee Saddam campaign, culminating in the international prime-time broadcast of the final spot on Saturday morning.
Bungee Saddam was also one of the most impressive pieces of snuff marketing in recent years. In the final clip, especially timed for the Sunni observance of Eid ul-Adha, the antihero star, Saddam Hussein Abd al-Majid al-Tikriti, walks out onto the platform, refuses a hood, fits the noose around his own neck, waves to the crowd with his trademark debonair wink and smile, then nods to the hangman to come in on the count of three before executing a beautiful swan dive to the end of his tether and the applause of the crowd.
"The White House's campaign was truly remarkable in its competence, at every level," said independent analyst Bill O'Reilly. "They leveraged their core skills in single-minded pursuit of their goal. Saddam was railroaded to the death penalty with such compelling speed, you'd think a Bush was in charge of Iraq."
The current campaign, which was first put to market in 2003 as a co-production with Britain and Poland, followed an earlier failed campaign from 1991.
"Orchestrating a good snuff campaign is trickier than it looks," said Karl Rove, the Presidential marketing advisor, after the award ceremony. "It's one thing to use a death you just happen to have footage of, but proper 'snuff' marketing, where the death is actually for the camera, is a lot harder. And oddly enough, it's easier the more people you need killed — just one needs remarkable coordination. Getting footage from Iraq over the past four years was a lot simpler than making sure this man was in this place at this time on this rope. There's media coverage to line up, cameras, judges who think the right way, a government that will lean on the judges, assassins for the defence lawyers ...
"I'm just glad we got the financial backers absolutely behind us. The movie biz is just completely unpredictable. 'No-one knows anything,' as William Burroughs said. But our sponsors had faith in us pulling off a fantastic deal for them, and the good Lord knows we did it. It's a win-win all the way down. Mission accomplished!"
The campaign is winding down, but is expected to continue well into 2007.
The Republican Party was up 0.9% in polling today.