UnDebate:Do you weigh more in the morning?

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search


edit Background information

Those who weigh themselves frequently will often find that the scales show that they have lost a few pounds overnight by doing nothing at all. In fact they can lose more weight snoozing for 8 hours than during a 2 hour intense physical workout. This is surprising to many people and certain lobbies have lined up for and against these findings.

edit You weigh more in the morning

edit Yes

Sleeping is a low energy activity in which breathing rate is reduced and the body goes into a state of paralysis (heavy drinking makes this paralysis more profound) and so cannot lead to the necessary energy output that such weight loss would imply. Some claim that sexual exertion is a major reason for their own nocturnal weight-loss, but in the author's experience this seems highly unlikely.

edit No

Careful measurement shows that an average person loses around 2 pounds each night during sleep. This is due to breathing, sweat, drool, urination and other bodily releases. Sleepwalking also adds to the steady nocturnal exertion. In extreme cases sleepwalkers have been known to catch a midnight movie, breakfast at Denny's and drop in at the 24-hour gym to do some free-weights.


edit Lazy people gain weight when they sleep

edit Yes

Lazy people tend to sleep a lot and actually gain weight, thus becoming both fat and lazy. The laziness causes the fat and the fat causes more laziness. The apparent readings of lower weight in the morning are explained by the fact that fat and lazy people cannot get a good visual on the gauge due to their considerable portliness. Lazy people are also not good at taking measurements since that involves getting up and finding a pen and paper to record them.

edit No

Laziness should not be confused with lack of activity. The brain is our most energy-demanding organ and is constantly calibrating and re-calculating the most efficient strategy for avoiding unnecessary motion. It may even lead in crisis-states to moving the body from the kitchen to the basement to avoid back-breaking chores, like taking out the trash. Even when apparently at rest a fat and lazy person can be clicking the buttons on a TV remote control, flexing those metacarpals, while simultaneously powering an elevated heart-rate and exceptionally high blood pressure. At sleep, the individual can no longer operate in this way, and so the unconscious motions of rolling over, flopping from side-to-side and snoring loudly consume large amounts of energy. It is therefore no surprise that pounds are shed in sleep.


edit Verdict

Facts are facts. If the measurements show that you lose weight by sleeping, then fat people should sleep more to shed those extra pounds. Thin people need to set the alarm, sleep less and perhaps watch some of those pre-dawn infomercials.

Personal tools
projects