UnBooks:UnRoadMap
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Lost? Accidently went off the side of a cliff? Your wife being a backseat driver? Then this, Uncyclopedia's own UnRoadMap is just the tool you need! In a very inconvenient format, you will be able to locate where exactly you are and how to get to your location, despite what your wife or insignificant other may state!
Whether you're American, Canadian, British, Engrish or Antarctican, this road map is a great resource for you!
edit The United States of America
This is for you, the American citizen, whether native or illegal immigrant, let's teach you how to get around these, the United States of America.
First, you need to understand how the road system works in America:
- A kilometer is called a mile.
- A liter is called a gallon.
- French Fries are called Freedom Fries.
- Highways are called Interstates
- Y'all is a real word
Now that we got that out of the way, let's start!
edit Alabama
Howdy y'all to Alabama, home of the partially free and proud state with the most trailer parks. Need to understand how to get around the simple state of Alabama? Let's roll! (translated into english, the Southerner actally said, "Ya best git yerself outta my staate 'fore i blow yer testicles off with my scatterguun!")
edit Alaska
Planning on visiting the snowy land of Alaska, or are you just lost? No worries, this state has snow plows making their roads somewhat accessible. You have to go through Canada though, so make sure to pick up some beer on the way.
edit Arizona
Interested in doing some gambling, whether it be legal or illegal, or perhaps you want to marry that woman you found on the corner of the street. Use this guide to get you through the hot and barren land that is known as Arizona!
edit Arkansas
Also known as the 'Ar in Kansas', follow this guide to take you to the land above the extended Gulf of Mexico.
edit California
Care to ride your Hummer through the massive roads of California? Use our stolen guide!
edit Colorado
Think you can brave the snow covered mountains of Colorado? Don't be a wuss, take the challenge!
edit Connectthedots
Don't take this state's small size for granted, it's roads are quite complex. Then again, that's my opinion, which you probably don't care about.
edit Delaware
...what? Just click the link.
edit Florida
Want to ride your Ferrari through the golden roads of Miami and Fort Lauderdale of Florida? you stinking rich.... Perhaps you just want to steal some oranges from local farms? This guide is for you!
edit Georgia
Come on, it's Georgia.
edit Hawaii
Of course you need a guide to the roads of Hawaii, just make sure your tires can handle lava flows.
edit Idaho
Hands hurt from typing...
edit Illinois
Even people in the middle of nowhere need road maps too!
edit Indiana
Beside the middle of nowhere!
edit Iowa
I hate repeating myself.
edit Kansas
Having difficulty navigating the weather-damaged roads of Kansas? Take a look!
edit Kentuckistan
Looking for the local Kentuckistan Fried Chicken, this guide can help!
edit Louisiana
I'll try my best...
edit Maine
Although it's still 'technically' part of Canada...
edit Maryland
Be merry in Maryland!
edit Massachusetts
edit Michigan
Although most of our roads are not recorded, you can still 'try' to drive around Michigan.
edit Minnesota
WHEN WILL THE Ms END?!
edit Mississippi
That place with the river.
edit Missouri
Or is it here...
edit Montana
Full of mountains, Montana is a driver's dream or nightmare for those starting to drive.
edit Nebraska
edit Nevada
The ultimate road map for those wanting to lose their money!
edit New Hampshire
The quick and easy way to get from Old Hampshire to New Hampshire.
edit New Jersey
Vwelcome to New Joysee!
edit New Mexico
Yes, there's a New Mexico, get used to it.
edit New York
And yes, four states with the word 'new'. Somebody wasn't creative.
edit North Carolina
Driving to South Carolina from the north? Guess what, you're going through North Carolina!
edit North Dakota
For whatever reason you need to drive through here, we're here to help somewhat.
edit Ohio
Trust me, it's bigger than you think.
edit Oklahoma
It's north of Texas, so this guide is a definite asset.
edit Oregon
Sure, Oregon is full of trees, but there are 'some' roads...aren't there?
edit Pennsylvania
Sounds delicious.
edit Rhode Island
For roads on Rhode Island, the island full of roads! Horrible man, horrible...
edit South Carolina
Need to get to North Carolina driving from the south, use our South Carolina guide!
edit South Dakota
Meh?
edit Tennessee
For that southern charm, in a middle state!
edit Utah
You...tah? Who comes up with these names?
edit Vermont
It's way the heck up there.
edit Virginia
I'm not making a vagina joke.
edit Washington
No, this is not Washington, DC, this is the more boring place to drive.
edit West Virginia
Good luck.
edit Wikipedia
Have you ever tried navigating Wikipedia? 1,500,000 roads and climbing, it's a freaking nightmare!
edit Wisconsin
Looking for some nice cheese or milk? Then Wisconsin is for you!
edit Wyoming
In the amount of time it took to get to this part of the page, you could be at your location in Wyoming by now.
edit Texas
If you ever think about navigating Texas on your own, you might as well shoot your genitalia.
edit Canada
Contrary to what people think, Canada isn't all snow and ice, only 85% of it is. They are also human too (or so most think) and need to get around to their friend's igloos. Thus, for those of you who visit Canada for some reason, or already live there, this guide is for you!
edit Ontario
Ever heard of the 400 series highway? No? Then be thankful for this guide to Ontario.
edit Quebec
You want to go to Quebec? Wow, you sure got some guts.
edit Nova Scotia
What the heck is Nova Scotia?
edit New Brunswick
AKA North Maine, home to Freedom French Fries.
edit Manitoba
On the way to the snowy white...north?
edit British Columbia
Just because its west coast is full of islands and mountains doesn't mean it doesn't have snowy roads! Gentlemen, welcome to West Virginia!
edit Prince Edward Island
Got a boat which can carry a car? Then come to Prince Edward Island!
edit Saskatchewan
edit Alberta
Alberta: Home of even more mountains! Who am I kidding, this is worse than West Virginia!
edit Newfoundland and Labrador
Yes, this is the home of the Newfie.
edit Northwest Territories
edit Yukon Territory
...The Northwest Territories has roads?
edit
Hey everybody, meet the new guy!
edit Alaska
One can wish, can't they?
edit The Filipino Empire
Some routes may contain many Filipinos living there; just run over them if you need to.

