From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

(Difference between revisions)
Jump to: navigation, search
(Places to avoid looking for treasure)
m (Reverted edit(s) of 15bitzers (talk) to last version by Psanec)
(2 intermediate revisions by 2 users not shown)
Line 62: Line 62:

Latest revision as of 03:25, December 29, 2014

Treasure Treasure is shiny and valuable stuff that is usually found in treasure chests.

edit History of treasure

Pirates have been burying treasure since the beginning of time itself, while treasure hunters armed with straws have in turn hunted it. Anthropologists have yet to determine what sort of benefits the pirates themselves are supposed to derive from this strange activity; although some suggest it is a form of altruism intended for the funding of future generations of anthropological studies.


Standard treasure map (circa 1666)

edit Treasure maps

Since all pirates are highly skilled in the scientific art of cartography, the location of every treasure chest is meticulously mapped via global positioning satellites and posted to alt.pirates.treasure.buried.yarrr for the benefit of amateur treasure seekers. Every valid treasure map must contain (at minimum) the following elements: dashed lines forming a path to follow, scary names for land and sea features, and a big stylized X to indicate the location of the treasure.

edit Typical contents of a treasure chest

edit Places to look for treasure

  • Landfills
  • Skips
  • Where X marks
  • Under palm trees
  • In neighbours' gardens
  • Unmanned stockrooms
  • Under the sea
  • The Moon
  • Anywhere that there are pirates

edit Places to avoid looking for treasure

edit See also

Personal tools
In other languages