Torbal the Viking

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Salcicciolian Viking 2

Torbal, drunk as usual.

“Torbal and I are the closest of friends...and by friends, I mean fuck buddys. ”
~ Oscar Wilde on Torbal

Torbal the Viking (Born 956 AD), sometimes Thorbal, or as he wants to be called, Torbal the Last Viking of Sweden was born in Stockholm during the Viking Age.

edit Childhood

Torbal never went to school. Since he was an orphan, he grew up in a shack with his thirteen brothers. They all worked in a nearby coal mine, where all of his brothers died, because of their allergy to the gas-sniffing canarie birds. Ironically, the canarie birds died of the stench from the brothers. Torbal himself wasn't allergic to canarie birds, and survived. At his 21- birthday (Yes, youre still a child at the age of 21, ok?), he moved from his shack to Las Vegas, in hope to win a big one. Instead, he got robbed by an unknown burglar and raped by a man on the street. Depressed, he began to drink and drink, until his liver exploded in a rain of blood and alchohol. Since he was a viking, he came to Valhalla, where Odin decided that Torbals foul stench of old sperm and liqour couldnt remain, and threw torbal out from the Land of the Dead, and back into life. What happened from here is a bit sketchy, but historians believe that he got a job at the local Burger King.

edit Adulthood

While working at Burger King, Torbal developed a taste for onions. Torbal is still working at the Las Vegas Burger King, eating onions and farting loudly at tourists.


edit Unnecessary Information

  • Torbal's favourite food is onions.
  • Torbal have been anal raped by Oscar Wilde.
  • Torbal's name in Swahili means "mature and cold", but Torbal isn't a native speaker of Swahili so this is irrelevant.
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