This page exposes the worlds most overrated bands. Please take careful note of understanding that solo performers such as Justin Bieber are not members of bands. But to find more on someone like Beiber, you might later wanna check out "Violence against women" or "Dude! Where's my career?"
And now, we let you know that we couldn't be bothered making a top 100, or even 50, hell... even 25 was pushing our literacy capabilities! So here is the finalists of our top 10 most overrated bands/groups of all time.
10 - MetallicaEdit
Hold back the waterworks Metallica fans, because you know deep down they truly do belong on this list. This group started out in the mid 1980's, claiming to be a garage metal band that said to hell with guitar solos. Guitarist and vocalist of the band,
Cowardly Lion James Hetfeild even fired original lead guitarist Dave Mustane because he kept trying to break out a solo during the songs. So Mustane left and formed Megadeath aka: Metallica-Lite.
Metallica soon began the first of many sell-out's of their career. The first time here was after releasing 3 garage metal albums that metal fans wet their underpants in more ways than one over, only to decide to take on a new direction. They where hungry for more, hungry for more respect, and well, they where just plain old hungry in general. Those original albums weren't generating enough to live and eat on. The band had always claimed they would never sell out and go mainstream, but when you have a family of 4 and multiple knocked up groupies needing alimony, is it any wonder the band was forced to sell-out and say, "To hell with fans, they ain't paying our mortgages, lets play something catchy rather than playing Black Sabbath songs sped up greatly." And so came the birth of the first commercially played album from the group.
"The Black Album" released in 1991 is Metallica's best album, in-fact, you could say it's Metallica's only album. An album is regarded to be wall to wall with great songs from start to finish, and contain little to no filler-tracks at all. Unlike their previous so called "glory days" albums Metallica's die-hard
fags fans talk about is supposedly the groups best work, yet no one seems to be able to find more than 1 or 2 tracks on each of those albums that is any good and worthy of calling a hit song. Three at the most! But record sales clearly show that "The Black" album is clearly the winner in sales over "Kill 'em All", "Justice for All" and "Ride the Lightning 'n All" and their tribute to The Carpenters greatest hits.
The group then sold out again in the mid 1990's when what is said to be the height of their ego trip got the better of them, and they didn't even need to finish the polishing off of records before releasing them. The follow up album to "Black" in 1995 titled "Load of Shit 'n All" bombed hard and fast in record sales. It wasn't that the songs where not decent, but more that each member of the band seemed to phone in their part of the recording. Reviews spread that too much bass occupied the overall sound, guitars where not sitting well in the tracks and they drowned each other out. It was said it did not help either that a pretty gay looking photo of the band with new short hair, slick haircuts, and 1970's porno mustaches made them look more like the type of guys you would keep your kids 100 feet from, rather than that old look where they looked like, well, someone you wouldn't take your kids within 105 feet of. Kerrang Metal magazine even asked "Are we looking at Metallica, or a Tom Selleck look-a-like convention photo? They should change their name to "Magnumtellica"
Metallica was said to consider themselves to be much better than they where at this point in time, especially drummer & wardrobe malfunction artist Lard Urlbitch, who took it upon himself to promote a little known computer program called "Napster" and make it the #1 thing everyone must have on their computers. Bill Gates however was pleased with the rally against Napster. Gates thought Windows 95 was going to bomb, however when word got out Lars was opposing a program that could download music for free, Windows 98 sales went skyrocketing and Bill Gates could not thank Metallica enough. The popularity boom of Napster only left a sour and bitter Lard Ulrich with crossed arms and sulking looks about having his music stolen. Lardass Alrich decided that Metallica would never record quality music ever again! He stated that if people are just going to download it, they wont be downloading good quality Metallica songs then. For the most part, no matter how hard Lurch cried, Windows 95 users just mocked him and said, "Yeah, great move genius, I don't even like you guys music, but I'll download it anyway, just to watch you sulk at music awards some more!"
Metallica sat around sulking for a few years that they could not win a battle they could not fight. So they decided to try a new venture for the band in 2003 by trying to reach audiences through a documentary. Little did Metallica expect that this documentary would make them the laughing stock of the metal world. The documentary was released under the title "Some Kind of Monster" the following year, but most fan's who have watched it said they had seen it before in "This is Spinal Tap". So their movie flopped softer than Michael Jackson going from watching Sesame Street to seeing nude pictures of Maggie Thatcher exploring the hairy muff of Hillary Clinton.... with Rosie O'Donnell fingering her own axe wound and licking... anyway, enough. Let's just forget that and move on.
The documentary was laughed at by critics, fans, and just anyone who saw it. It showed the process of the band receiving therapy to put up with Lars not being over Napster, and wanting to sue everyone around him. The discover they each just need their own personal bubble space and to work on the next album. More therapy was needed when the rest of the band wanted to record something decent again, but in the end, Lars got his way and the result was the release of the terrible album "St Wanker 'N All".
Metallica now only make money on live tours. They don't bother to release albums anymore, just a cluster fuck of sounds with electric guitars not plugged in, and Lars banging away at pots and pans. Kirk Hammett does however every now and then still prove he is truly an overrated guitarist, proof is revealed when hearing him play his own music, compared to a drunken solo during a live show that he says is supposed to contain a bunch other artists classic riffs, however to most ears, it sounds like the worse version of that particular riff you have ever heard.
Metallica have come to realize that listening to Lards advice on band direction was a stupid idea. However, if they fired Lard, he would just cross his arms and whinge, probably even diss the rest of the band on Twitter or something. So they just pretend nothing happened, but secretly attempt to join forces with other groups like ex-arch rivals Magadeath, whoever the hell ex-bassist Jason Newstead joined, and begging Ozzy Osbourne to sing for them. Just to keep up with the Joneses.
09 - NicklebackEdit
This group doesn't actually belong on this list! They are great musicians and everyone secretly does love one or two songs by this group! They just wont admit it! It seems the band fell victim to internet memes where photos of the group had subtitles placed over them in derogatory ways. The truth is, people often just say they hate this band, because everyone else is saying they hate them, even tho probably none of them have actually listened to any of their songs, as fans agree on. Fans beleive strippers all around the world should be dancing to "Something in your mouth" and "Shakin' Hands". Interviews with strippers say the want to, they really do, but they are afraid if anyone recognizes the artist, they wont get a piece of contagious germ ridden paper with a dead presidents faces on it shoved into the front patch of their g-string.
Nickleback have really taken a lot of flack from people, but they stay true to their music and keep rolling with the punches.
It's said that anyone who meet these guys have nothing bad to say about them at all. They are friendly, and well mannered, they even donate a lot to charity. But because we here at this site don't wanna be made fun of, we just roll with the trend, so included here in the top 10 most overrated bands of all time is none other than the king of douche-bags and overrated band, Nickleback!
08 - YesEdit
Yes, the superstar group of progressive rock -- You remember them, don't you? Oh, dear! Anyway, like historian Francis Fukuyama (You remember him, don't you?), who wrote that it was the "end of history," Yes decided that it was the end of 4/4 time, C-F-G chord progressions, and songs with the decency to limit themselves to three minutes. Yes was the most innovative group in history, including the invention that the listener really wanted to hear, right in the middle of a peppy song, a three minute digression into weepy violin music. Twice. With random lyrics written during a game of Charades, ten musical themes mixed by dice roll, and symphony orchestras sprinkled in at the most inopportune times.
Yes split up and re-formed no fewer than a dozen times during its seven decades, with various artists owning the rights to song lyrics and occasionally even the word Yes, without which it is difficult to participate in a police interrogation. The remaining members would do concerts under contrived band names and wink to the audience in creative ways that they are the real thing.
It was the 'Nineties when alimony became unusually burdensome and band members forsook their signature style in order to make records that a significant number of listeners would actually buy. Their ardent followers (who never bought records in their lives, any more than they would pay to entrust their ponytails to a barber) simply recorded their songs off the radio and considered this era a descent into commercial whoring. Happily, the band re-formed again and resumed recording songs which, like opera, everyone gushes about and explains to each other with no one really understanding them.
The band has embarked on a worldwide Sixtieth Anniversary Tour, made feasible by the fact that all concert halls are now wheelchair-accessible and the concession has a booth for wigs and Botox.
07 - The MonkeesEdit
"Hey, Hey, we're the Brady Bunch, and people say we rip of The Beatles. But we're to busy being cheesy, to ever put our instruments down". If anyone is old enough to remember, or listened to those late 1960's acid trip
musical experimental compositions of some sort, where everyone with an instrument was trying to discover new sounds and ways to play it (mostly finding irritating ways to make guitars sound like mosquito's mating with flies) Then you can blame that experimental crap you had to be tripping on to enjoy on The Monkees. Musicians tried those things to get away and save music from the sick and tiring sounds of hearing The Monkees happy-go-lucky, goody-two-shoes songs about how they almost couldn't preform because their magic school bus broke down on the way to the gig, but they found a new friend in the end.
The Monkees, or as they where more popularly known, The singing Brady Bunch invaded TV and corrupted children's minds into thinking their favorite show of the time, The Brady Bunch had turned into a traveling hippy bubble-gum pop-band. Kids where really stupid and gullible in these days. They still believed if a nuclear bomb went off, they should just stop, drop and roll a joint. You can think yourself lucky that the LCD babies era is over, and that hippy music had gone down faster than Jay Leno's puckered-ip lips to a celebrity guests rectum on The Tonight Show. The next phase was the acid babies flipping on their heads and spinning in circles, but the formation of Hip-Hop is another story all together.
The Monkees covered piss-poor versions of the big pop songs of that decade, including, "Koom-ba-ya, my lord", "Greensleeves" and "Raped & Freezin'" by Alice Cooper. Eventually Alice heard this version and invited them up on stage with him one night, put them in chicken suits, stuck their heads in a guillotine, and chopped their heads off one by one! The next day headlines read that Alice had ripped the head off a chicken and drank it's blood... it's great when even 10,000 people at a rock concert gave the same lies in an alibi to hide the truth, and thank fuck the career of The Monkees came to an end!
06 - One DirectionEdit
What has 82 legs and no pubic hairs? The front row of a One Direction show! It's an absolute mystery how this group formed. Same say that it started when it seemed like putting up with one faggot named Justin Beiber wasn't bad enough, along came 5 Beibers in one! Other beleive it's possible that record companies felt their was not enough kiddy fiddling music in the world yet! Perhaps "Macaulay Culkin" handed all the money he made from "Home Alone" and said, "Put together the sort of group my dearly beloved
boyfriend would have liked to see". If that's the case, then by the looks of it, they did the perfect job.
As we are fucked if we know what these heterosexually challenged young boys sing, we can't actually tell you the name of one of their songs. They seem to only be popular with 12 year olds, and fly under the radar of anyone else hearing ability. However, they obviously wrote something, if 12 year old girls want them to fist their virginity to pieces claiming these guys play music, then there must be some sort of truth to it?.
From what 12 year olds tell us, the boy's are very cute and sexy. This automatically puts them in anyone elses category of "Faggots". And hope they suffer the same fate as Beiber himself, and retire while they can before their balls drop and their careers are over. Unless of coarse they pull a Britney/Madonna desperate for media attention act, and make out with Eminem and Sinbad during a fake award ceremony.
Even tho it seems we don't know any of their music, being that they are fags, they are fair game for the overrated bands top 10 list.
05 - WeenEdit
Just go listen to "Push the little daisies to make em come up" and you need not ask anymore why there is nothing more to read here.
04 - No DoubtEdit
This band is living proof why cousins should not be allowed to fuck. As stated by famous actor Clint Howard! They came onto the scene with a song called "I shouldn't speak, but i'm a fucking girl, so try to stop me" in the late 90's. They called themselves No Doubt, however, no doubt about it, no one out there can name a single member of this fucking group other then the lead whiner Gwen Stepfanny. Believe us, we tried to find someone! We interviewed like 9 people, and none of them knew! And if that's good enough for television rating polls, that's good enough for uncyclopedia to call a fact!
The No Doubt group released their next biggest
s hit shit "I'll soon be your next ex-girlfriend before I can't stop speaking" just before Gwen decided she should go solo. This showed the full extent of how far her retardation had become, as no one cared about her solo debut, no one bought her album, in-fact, no one even knew she went solo at all. We polled that too! She then returned to the band and continued on in her next dumb move, (polled it!) Seemed no one cared about that band reforming, nor if shes solo or not, which would probably make anyone realize you should probably quit music or go floss your teeth on one of Lady GaGa's pubic hairs from her left testicle at a music award show to gain more popularity for a kick-start to a dead career. Didn't poll that one, but we don't need to, it sounds factual enough!
It looked like No Doubt where even too dumb to understand they where being mocked when their song "I'll make you hurl ('cause i can't stop speaking)" was voted #1 most retarded sounding intro to a song, period. By a factual group who give out real awards like that one! Gwen accepted the paper cut-out award with a smile and said she can't beleive she's won! And she couldn't do it without the help of her mother who pushed too hard during labor and projectiled Gwen into the delivery room wall at over 45mph. When asked how could someone come up with a riff so shit as "beppa bep bep, bop, bop, bop, bop" she admitted she was listening to a Hanson song and the record began to skip. It's not bad enough she ripped off someone else s riff, but to rip it off from Hanson? Music lover and those who appreciate it say it's a no wonder the bitch's career is now deader than parachute pants. The ASPCA however may not allow her to ever go homeless, so we dreadfully can report she may still make a comeback someday. Donations to the "Just put her down already" fund can be found at all good leading animal euthanasia clinics.
03 - NirvanaEdit
It's said that marijuana is proven to be a gateway to worse drugs, and many consider Nirvana to be the dope in mainstream music that fucked it up completely. Nirvana hit the scene in the early 1990's and showed depressed suicidal teenagers that you do not need any talent what-so-ever to pick up a guitar and rape 3 chords passing it off as music. The absence of rhythm, playing lead or even knowing what a fucking bass line is meant to be for was proven you can make money from it when these punks came out of Seattle and forced itself into the anus of mainstream music, raping it by storm. Music fans turned their backs on radio, and walked away to strictly listen to their favorite acts via CD or Cassette, while depressed 14 year old's took a liking to Kurt Cobain and his depressing "go kill yourself" wave of pre-emo lyrics.
Mainstream went from fun and talented performers to jerkoffs who could not play for shit, and soon Nirvana inspired many more pre-day emo's to pick up an instrument and have non-consented sex with a $3000 guitar that their parents bought for them, so they could pretend to be playing a chord while drowning it out with their whines of how their life sucks so much because their is never anything good on TV anymore or their parents bought the them the wrong colored Porsche 911.
Nirvana's most well known song is "Smells like Teen Jizz". A song which is the only song the band ever constructed properly. As in an intro to a verse, to a chorus, to a verse, to a solo, to a final verse. However Kurt Cobain was an emo-faggot and always wanted to be different from mainstream, so how did that song get written and performed by them? The truth came out a year after it's release from Curt that he hated that fucking song. He even admitted the band did not write it! They stole it from some half assed decent band that lived down the street. Proofing even their best known song was not even their own fucking work. Which explains a lot about the other songs they wrote, as anyone can agree with.
The only other semi-retarded hits these emo punks dished out was "Cum on my arm" and "About a Girl, ewww, they have cooties n stuff". These 3 mentioned songs may still get overplayed on today's radio by the ones who still play their crap... but it's pretty obvious to those who have listened to the entire back catalog of Nirvana, that Curt sobered up one day, listened to his own songs, depressed himself so much, and realized he had completely fucked up mainstream music forever! That's believed to be the real reason he blew his own brains out!
When you hear acts now like Justin Beiber, Kanye West and Britney Spears, many and most blame such shit being allowed to be released and called mainstream on Curt Cobain. He depressed an entire generation. A generation that soon found themselves well after Curt's death when the Xanex kicked in, they had not been exposed to great music from the 50's to 80's, instead they heard depressing music, written by cunts who never learned to play an instrument, and figured guitars sound horrible... they just screamed "Play me something with no guitars and is so happy, happy, joy, joy that it's super-gay". Hence Boys II Men where born, and mainstream music has dived deep down ever since.
02 - GreendayEdit
To a Greenday fan, these guys are just a group of guys with a singer they want to fuck. To the rest, they perfect example of why bands should learn to play their instruments before recording. To truly understand how bad this band is in need of musical lessons, then look no further than listening to one of their cover songs. Try their cover of AC/DC's "Highway To Hell" and find one person commenting on that song that these guys are respectful musicians to them. Greenday eased their way onto the scene in reverse with their butts up high looking to be broken into mainstream music. Equipped with nothing going for them but being labeled as "Those fags with skunks for hair styles" they dropped their first
shit hit shit with a single called "When I bum fuck around" in 1994.
Soon enough fans of Nirvana had found a replacement for hearing shitty music they thought was not mainstream and cool, without realizing it was mainstream and for tools. Soon enough they had written one of the all time most overplayed and overrated pieces of shit called "I hope you buy my albums for life, or we will have to go back to working at McDonalds, as this is the only fucking thing we have going for us.". Voted #1, #2, and #3 shittiest ballad written by an emo 7 years running. Soon that song was followed up by ripping off a classic riff & calling it "Bitchin' over copyrights" before fading into the darkness and only not fading into total obscurity due to the ongoing brain damaging effects of the drugs their fans took in the 90's. Those that where not effected by the drugs can often not be seen online in reviews apologizing for aiding this bands popularity.
Even older fans of the band now that have sobered up can admit you can note that only 2 or 3 of these emo cock gugglers songs are played the radio now. And how many of these so called great songs they are supposed to have written can you name, let alone have heard of a successful band covering? People often just invade the Greenday website's message board and speak to their fans, saying things like Remember the time Billy Joel got up on stage and sang with the likes of Mick Jagger, Micheal Jackson or Cher? That's because even half-assed stars who had to buy their own albums to achieve record sale history knew Greenday sucked monkeys balls. Hell, even Tom Jones didn't invite them to play on his big "Trying hard to make a comeback and sound cool for once"... fuck, if that's not proof, then why didn't even Carlos Santana ask them to play or sing with him? He's whored himself out to just about everyone! Even the Kardashians and Justin Beiber, who wouldn't know what talented music was if it rented space up their ass, know these guy's are overrated hacks that never should have been given a record contract, let alone innocent musical instruments that could have been played the way they where designed for, but instead ended up being abused and never had a correct note involving two or more strings ever played on it... unless of coarse the roadies tuned them up for them. In which most likely ended with members of Greenday firing that roadie for tuning the guitar, but them thinking he now de-tuned it, and had them cracking the shits at him that tuning the guitar like that will snap the rod inside the neck. That and a lot of comments like "Greenday are fags" which is pretty much the quicker way of saying all of the previous!
01 - Red Hot Chili PeppersEdit
The most overrated band of all time goes to these clowns. They broke new wind in the early 90's by writing nothing more than mediocre hits such as "Suck my dick" and "Give your virginity away now". But in the mid 1990's they released what is officially the most overrated song, sorry, piece of shit, of all time. The song was called "Under the bridge is where I will let you give your virginity away by sucking my dick and if you are a man who wants to taste another mans jizz in my airplane". The intro guitar is renowned world wide as the most recognizable use of the C chord that causes an instant headache. The tunes intro has been found to be a way to torture terrorists and those above half decent musicians ear-drums whenever it is overly played on every god damn radio station every fucking day around the world who still plays any artists songs that has outstayed it's welcome.
This group also features the a member that many consider to be the most overrated bass guitarist of all time, Flea Powder, Jnr, yes that's his name! As stupid as it sounds, we didn't make it up! His mother and father where cruel to name their child Flea, but his sister copped it far worse naming her Gertrude.
Flea often is seen in top 10 lists as the greatest bass player of all time. This however is complete and utter bullshit to 98% of the readers, but because Kurt Cobain killed main stream music forever, the kids of the 90's did not get to hear what talent was anymore, so they figured Flea was great because he was out-standing compared to the likes of bass players from punk and grunge bands who never took lessons to learn anything more than how to play the intro to "Smells Like Teen Bullshit"... and some fucked up, and very incorrect version of the theme from "Seinfeld". With both their taste in music and comedy, it's no wonder 15-19 year old's mistake the few guitar lesson Flea had made him sound like he was the best around.
The theory of Flea's talent is shot down in flames in an instant whenever someone says Flea is the number one bass player around, and a real music lover, or someone who has taken more than a couple of guitar lessons strikes back.