Tommy (album)

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“That deaf, dumb, and blind kid sure plays a mean pinball. ”

~ Roger Daltrey on Tommy

“What a tight ass...I mean, um...”

~ Uncle Bernie on Tommy

“The best thing Uncle Ernie ever did”

~ rodrigou los daltreyos on Uncle Ernie doing tommy


Album Cover (note the Who's frontman/lemming in-chief, Pete Townshend, reaching for some child porn)

Tommy (or 'Tomas' as it was originally written in Puerto-Rican Spanish) is a Rock Opera by the rock group The Who. All songs excluding three were re-arranged from Leonard Bernstien's "A Little Night Music" and Richard Pryor's "Where da hell is da whorehouse in dis town?" It tells the story of the exploitation of a deaf, dumb, and blind boy who plays a hell of a mean pinball.

Contents

[edit] History

After the incredible success of their previous album 'the who blow up' and its predecessors 'a swift hand job' and 'the who sing your veneration' they realized they needed something epic to top their incredible sales figures. Pete Townshend said in an early interview, "I'll bite your head off if you ask me any more questions" While the rest of the band set about becoming part of the led zeppelin myth, the secret mastermind behind the group, Malcolm Mclaren, saw an opportunity for great work to be created, and popped 200ml of lsd into Townshend's tea. Townshend was immediately hospitalized, and during his hospitalization, he imagined what it owuld be like to be deaf dumb, blind and a motown queen. Although he would not remember any of his experiences when he came out of his coma, deep in his sub-conscious, he would always long to be a Motown queen. The seeds were set for him to create his greatest masterpiece - crommy - a book on Oliver Cromwell's little publicized affair with Diana Ross. To pass the time, he also started on "some shit about a pinball magician, i dunno"

[edit] Composition

In Early 1968 Townshend had just met with rolling stone John Lennon at a party on the Moon, Not really, both Townshend and Lennon were trippin' on Acid, They were really in the Basement of "Crazy Larry Lunchtime Disco" A well Known Gay bar in Brighton. Lennon suggested that Townshend make an Album that told a story, Townshend agreed and wrote Jonny, The story of a deaf, dumb, and blind kid who is sold in to the Child Porn Industry. Lennon dissuade him from this plot-line saying "You Crazy Mother Fucker they'll have you Jailed“. Townshend then reinvented the story naming it Tommy about a deaf, dumb, and blind boy who plays pinball.

[edit] Recording Session

When The Who announced on August 20th 1968 that they were to begin work on a new album, their fans were less than excited. Early on in the sessions Roger and Pete had an argument over who would get the last jelly doughnut; the argument soon turned violent and ended with Roger giving Pete the silent treatment, which is why Pete sings lead vocals on the first three songs. About midway through the recording the album, the band was flat broke due to their lack of touring and their expensive drug, alcohol, and hooker addition. To increase cash flow The Who had to resort to pimping.
Four of the Who's Ho's
After the money issues were resolved, the band continued working on the second half of the album, but many problems would ensue. On March the first, drummer Keith Moon, after a night heavy drinking, was hit by a bus while he was passed out in the middle a London street. Moon was hospitalized for 2 weeks. During his absence former Holocaust victim Anne Frank filled in. But the worst event of the entire recording session was when the band came into the studio one morning and found Beatle Paul McCartney covered in blood with band mates George Harrison and John Lennon standing over him. Lennon turned and said, "We went out drinking last night, one thing led to another and George and I ended up sodomizing and beating Paul to death." Then Harrison said, "Help us hide or we're fucked." Townshend and Moon agreed to help and moved McCartney's body to a nearby sawmill and ran it through a wood chipper (Just like in Fargo). Finally on May 1st the album was finished and released two weeks later. It was subsequently panned by ever major critic.

[edit] Characters

  • Tommy Walker: Tommy is said to have constipation, AIDS, and Tay-Sachs, all of which he inherited from his naughty Uncle Ernie.
  • Captain Walker: Tommy's father, presumed dead, which turns out not to be true, that comes back and kills Frank.
  • Mrs. Walker: The Slut who started fucking around with another guy only nine months after her husband went M.I.A.
  • Frank: Tommy's "step-father" who fucked Captain Walker's wife.
  • Uncle Ernie: An HIV-positive fag who had Tommy spend a weekend with him.
  • Cousin Kevin Federline: Tommy's cousin, who is a sexual sadist .
  • The Hawker: A giant bird
    The Hawker in the 1975 film version
  • The Champ:A chronic masturbator who gets off on pinball.
  • The Acid Queen (AKA "The Gypsy"): A prostitute with a hell-of-a-lot of LSD.
  • The Doctor: A doctor who attempts to heal Tommy with “a great new experimental procedure” and nearly kills him. He is sued by the Walker family, which then received a lump sum of 5 million pounds.
  • Sally Simpson:Tommy's bitch ho'".

[edit] Track Listing

  • 1.Daddy's gone off to war.
  • 2.It's Got a Penis.
  • 3.Oh shit daddy is back and he's pissed bigtime, so he killed step daddy and now Tommy is blind?
  • 4.Aw freakin' A! Im in a quiet vibration land.
  • 5.Annoying and Repetitive Instrumentals Part.1.
  • 6.Having Sex With my Ho Will Make Your Child See.
  • 7.Tommy's Going to Hell.
  • 8.Torture
  • 9.Gypsy with a hell of a lot of LSD.
  • 10.Annoying and Repetitive Instrumentals Part.2
  • 11.Do you Think It's all right to leave Tommy With a Drunken Pedophile, Of Course.
  • 12.Child Rape(A tribute to Pete).
  • 13.Useless Talent.
  • 14.There's a Hack I've Found.
  • 15.Look in the Mirror Blind Boy.
  • 16.Bad Luck for 7 Years.
  • 17.Tommy Can You Hear Me(No, I'm Deaf, you Dumbass!)
  • 18.Orgasm.
  • 19.Jesus Intervenes.
  • 20.Sally the Slut.
  • 21.Incarceration.
  • 22.Fuck You, Go Away.
  • 23.That Weird Fuck is Back.
  • 24.See Me, Feel Me, Blow Me.

[edit] Personnel

  • Roger Daltrey – Screams, harmonica
  • Pete Townshend – guitars, keyboards, vocals
  • John Entwistle – bass guitar,Blowing Horns, vocals
  • Keith Moon – Nothing
  • Paul Townshend (Pete's brother) – Backing Vocals
  • Simon Townshend (Pete's brother) – Backing Vocals
  • Mike Townshend (Pete's brother) - Backing Vocals
  • Mama Townshend (Pete's Mother) - Backing Vocals
  • John Townshend (Pete's Father) - Backing Vocals
  • Arthur Townshend (Pete's Third Cousin Trice Removed) - Fart Noises, sexual sounds
  • Peté Townshend (Pete's Evil Twin) - Malevolent Laughs
  • Dnehsnwot Etep (Pete in opposed land) - Slacov Gnikcab
  • Pete Townshend (Pete Parallel Universe Twin) -Banjo
  • Grandmamma Townshend (Pete's Grandmother) -Foul Mouth
  • Mammy Townshend (Pete's Big Black Mama) - Talkin' 'Bout Fried Chickens, Waffles and Water Mellons.

[edit] Accusations of Nepotism

In late 1969 Roomers Stared to spread that the reasons for 11 of Pete's Relatives working on Album was not because of talent, but blatant Nepotism on Townsend’s Part. The Roomers later turned out to be true and Townsend was castigated By Polydor Records Executive Burt Tomland Jr.(Son of Record head Burt Tomland Sr. )

[edit] Movie

In 1975 a film version of Tommy was released, it starred "sex-kitten turned massive pile of lard" Ann Margret as Tommy's Mother, The tone-deaf and oafish Oliver Reed as Uncle Frank(In the Film, unlike the album Uncle Frank kills Captain Walker) and Roger Daltrey as the Tommy.
Jack Nicholson as The Doctor
.Other minor roles include Eddie Izzard as the Acid Queen, renowned British homosexual Elton John as the Pinball Champ, Lynndie England as Cousin Kevin and Jack Nicholson as The Doctor. The Film has the same Plot as the Album, with one large difference, there's moving pictures. The Movie was directed by crack head Ken Russle. The Film itself is nothing more than actors dressed in colorful outfits jumping around and doing some weird shit, this was meant to entertain the retarded members of the movie watching community.

It has been described by critics variously as "decidedly French", "a staggering waste of Oliver Reed's overwhelmingly beautiful singing voice", and "a rare opportunity to see renowned fascist Eric Clapton alongside possible pedophile Pete Townshend together on the big screen."


[edit] Awards

  • Roger Daltrey won a Golden Globe for Best New Piece of Ass in Film
  • Pete Townshend won a Golden Globe for Best Bastardization of a Piece of Fine Art
  • The Who won a raspberry for "dumbest piece of shit in a looooooong time that passes time for stoners."
  • Ann-Margaret was nominated for an Academy Award for Best Actress, But lost to Pia Zadora.

[edit] See Also

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